Chicken Tender Day is a day sent from the Gods to us malnourished college students. Whoever made it up deserves a Gold Medal in the Olympics for food. For those of you who do not have an idea what this magical day is like, let me paint a picture for you:
It is 7 pm on a Wednesday. You have just had two tests that you are pretty sure you bombed. On top of that you have a 10-page paper due on Friday. You have just gotten to the dining hall after you slipped in the snow and got your new pants soaked. Your mom is nagging you about your grades, your phone is about to die and you see a picture of your ex with a new sweet thang (Suite Life of Zack and Cody reference, I'm not sorry). Today is a pretty crap filled day. But alas, you get your plate and walk to where all of the food is. What is that you see?! It can't be..... Is that..... Chicken Tenders? Yes, yes you are correct. It is the beloved Chicken Tender Day. You fill up your plate and stuff your face. Now your tummy is happy and you are in a better mood.
That being said, there are some things that need to be said to the dining hall regarding this holiday. Now that you can actively visualize what it is like to walk into the dining hall when it is Chicken Tender Day, every other day is rather ordinary. This is a letter to the dining hall, so buckle up and get ready to #hailchickentenderday.
Dear Dining Hall,
You never fail to make something that should be mouth watering, become unappetizing. Pasta is overcooked, cheese isn't cheese, pizza is soggy, meat is dry and the veggies are undercooked.
However, once and a while, there are these beautiful days in which you serve chicken tenders. These are magical, sensational days. Chicken tenders never fail to bring a smile to my face, they "light up my world like nobody else." Thank you for this wonderful gift of a day. Blessed be chicken tenders.
Chicken Tender Day only comes once and a while, which never fails to disappoint me. It is a phenomenon across campus. When the dining hall is serving this wondrous 5 star dish, not only can you finally find food to eat, but you can even find french fries to complete the meal.
Sadly, chicken tenders are becoming scarce. Chicken Tender Day is happening less and less (that's right dining hall, I've noticed). Get it together! Chicken Tender Day used to be the highlight of my week. Now it is the highlight of my month. This is nawt okay by me and by my fellow students.
Please bring chicken tenders back more regularly, it would really help us college students look forward to meals again.
Love,
A Hungry College Student