Dear Ex-Best Friend,

I know it has been awhile, but I would like to say that I miss you, but a part of me knows that you probably don’t care. There is still a piece of my heart that hopes that you do. I would like to apologize; I wish things didn’t end the way they did, I wish we still talked. You were so prideful and never apologized and now too much time has passed and it’s too late.

But now, I would like to say I’m sorry for a number of things. I’m sorry that you have to answer questions about how I’m doing to your family and our old friends. I’m sorry that I call someone new my best friend. I’m sorry that I made you the carrier for a lot of my secrets. I’m sorry that I stopped caring. I’m sorry that we aren’t making all the memories we thought we would be at this time. I’m sorry for never uploading those photos of us, and now it’s too late. I’m sorry that we are no longer friends.

Along with “I’m Sorry” comes “Thank you." Thank you for letting me get to know your family, and for you all being my second family when mine forgot about me. Thank you for letting me call you best friend. Thank you for keeping secrets. Thank you for all the memories we share and all the embarrassing photos we took. Thank you for being the perfect best friend for that time in my life.

Remember when you got your license, and we would travel everywhere without parents because we could. We never thought that the rest of the world could tear us apart the way it did. We could never imagine a summer vacation without laying in the sand on the beautiful beaches. We grew up quickly, and then lost each other in the mix.

I hope you go to school and then graduate and eventually find your dream job. I hope you don’t get stuck living somewhere you dislike. I hope that your family is doing well also. The thing about ex-best friends… you still hope they’re doing well because despite everything: they deserve it and you do care for them.

I will always read your tweets, and stalk your photos, and I will always watch your Snapchats. For me, the friendship is a fond memory. I will always hope for the best whether you’re on your last final of college, your wedding day, and before all major life events. And when my kids and your kids become the age we were when we became friends, I will look back fondly at the years we spent eating too much froyo, crying over boys, and encouraging each other to be brave young women who stand up for themselves.

Just because we aren’t best friends, it doesn’t mean I hate you. Read that again. Just because we aren’t best friends, it doesn’t mean I hate you. In fact, it means just the opposite. Because we were best friends, I will always love you. I know this is true because in five years when I run into you at Walmart, or at the mall because I’m home for whatever reason, we will be happy to see each other. We will probably hug and exchange awkward conversation about how you didn’t know I was in town, and small talk about how our lives are going right now.

I look forward to this day. I will get to hear about all of the amazing things you’ve done since we stopped talking. For a moment neither of us will remember why our twenty-year-old selves stopped being friends and we will be cordial with each other. I look forward to bumping into you and hearing about your husband, and your kids. I look forward to hearing that you’re happy.

So just know, I’m not mad at you. I’m not mad anymore. I wish you all the best and all the happiness. I will always be rooting for you.

Sincerely,

Your Ex-Best Friend..