When I was little, I grew up next to a girl named Victoria. She was a few years older than me, but due to us being the only two girls living on our street we became friends by default. Every day after I got home from kindergarten, I would lug my big pink box full of Barbies over to her house and would stay all afternoon in her room playing together. She was my first best friend, and the first girl I ever really looked up to. One day, I remember packing up my pink box and running over to play with Victoria like I always did, except when I got there Victoria wasn’t waiting at the door to meet me. Confused, I entered and found her in the room playing with another little girl. Instantly I felt things were different, my friend barely acknowledged I was there and when the other girl tried to engage me in their games, Victoria would snap at her and pull her away. After awhile I felt my welcome disappearing and I began to pack my Barbies to return back home. Victoria only owned one doll herself and noticed I was packing mine and grew upset. She told me to leave my dolls and to go home. We began arguing back and forth until she grabbed my arms and started hitting and scratching me. Her mom heard me crying and Victoria yelling, and came in to separate us. As Victoria got scolded, I quietly packed my Barbies. Her friend helped me silently and whispered that she was sorry as I got up to leave. When I got home, I went straight to my room, lying to my mom about why I was upset. It was the first time I had ever felt betrayed by a friend. I didn’t understand what I had done to make Victoria turn on me so suddenly. Things between us never went back to normal after that day, and my family moved away shortly after.

Before that day, I assumed that when someone was your friend that they would never betray you. That friends would stand by your side no matter what, through thick and thin. I truly believed in “best friends forever.” What I didn’t realize is that friendships like that don’t come every day. Not every person that makes you laugh and shares an interest is truly your friend. A true friend is not someone who values what things they can gain from you. Nor is it someone who is only around for the happy times. Friends should not be like shadows, they should be there during both the bright and gray days. Friendship should come easily but to maintain a true friendship it requires work and effort on both ends, but most importantly of all it requires loyalty. A true friend is someone who not only stands by your side but also someone who remains true when you are not around. True friends will be excited to see you succeed and there for you when you fall. Don’t build fires for those who wouldn’t even strike a match for you. A true friend is invaluable and should be treated as such.

Now that I am older I have had my fair share of friendships that have come and gone, some due to negligence on their part and some due to my own. But from each friendship that didn’t last, I learned a lesson to help me maintain the ones I have now. I have learned not to waste my time on fair weather friends, but instead to invest my energy into friends who I know would never purposefully hurt me. The friends that I have today are some of the strongest and most incredible people that I have ever met. They are not perfect and neither am I, and we have learned to understand and respect each of our downfalls. They are there for me when I make mistakes, am melodramatic, and when I need them the most. Those are the type of friends that are here to last. And with friends like mine, who needs girls like Victoria anyway.