Wake up.
Brush teeth.
Pick out outfit.
Make sure it isn’t too revealing.
But also make sure it isn’t too “prude”.
Put on makeup.
Just enough to hide what is wrong, but not enough that you can tell.
The “makeup that looks like there is no makeup” look.
Keep hair down and kept in front of your shoulders, less likely for it to be pulled like that.
Make sure pepper spray is in your purse, easy enough to access if needed.
Phone in pocket, headphones in.
Leave your house and head to class/work/etc.
Keep your head down.
Don’t make eye contact with anyone.
“Hey cutie, come over here.”
Resist the urge to respond. Responding could lead to an altercation and yelling and you don’t want to have to use the pepper spray.
Ignore the comment.
Ignore all the comments.
“Sexy”, “Nice tits”, “Ever been with a big man like me?”, etc.
Turn up your music to muffle the sounds of men catcalling you.
But don’t let it be too loud or you won’t know if they are behind you.
Go to class.
Answer questions.
But not enough that you seem like a know-it-all.
But also answer enough that you don’t seem like a “dumb girl”.
Go home.
Change for the party.
Wear something cute.
But not something too short.
If something were to happen, you will be asked what you were wearing so make sure it’s appropriate.
Go to party.
Drink, but not too much.
Don’t tell the drunken slob that is hitting on you to “Eff off” even if the smell of alcohol on his breathe is making you sick. But also try not to lead him on. They will ask you if you did.
Take another sip.
Don’t take a drink from anyone.
You can’t risk being roofied.
You can’t risk being raped, because it must be easier to teach females how to not get raped than telling men how to not rape.
Watch your friends.
Make sure they aren’t leaving with a stranger if they are drunk.
Drink some more, drinking away your worries, but not enough that your judgement is too impaired. If raped, they will ask how much you were drinking.
Jump on the subway.
Keep your head down.
Ignore the men staring at you.
Pray that they don’t say anything to you in this confined space.
Make sure your friend come back with you, safe and sound.
Get home.
Throw your heels in the corner.
Take off your makeup.
Put on your pajamas.
Go to bed.
Wake up and repeat again the next day.
And the next.
And the next.
This is what women must deal with on a daily basis. Not just in New York City, but all over the world. From the big cities to the smallest towns. Making sure they are proper, looking attractive but not too attractive, getting cat called, hoping to god they don’t get raped by the men cat calling them. This is rape culture. This is the society we teach girls to live in. We teach them all the ways to avoid being raped, how to dress and act so society thinks they are pure angels, instead of teaching men the meaning of consent and respecting woman and not cat calling them just for walking down the street. We must teach the younger generation how to stand up for themselves without being afraid. We must teach consent from a young age.
Women should not have to fear going out alone at night because they could be grabbed and raped. This should not be the fear.
Wearing a short dress does not cause rape. A face of makeup does not cause rape. What you are wearing does not cause rape. How much you are drinking does not cause rape.
Rapists cause rape.
When are we going to stop blaming the victims?
Why can I not go a day without being cat called or stared at by men at least once, even when wearing a sweatshirt, baggy pants, and no makeup?
When will woman no longer be nervous to go out alone at night?
When are we going to stop allowing rape culture to grow?
