There are different kinds of dating as you grow up. When you first start dating, you're young, for me I was in 8th grade, and you just want to know what it's like to date someone. It's not at all serious. You're holding hands in the hallway, passing notes, and maybe getting your mom to take you to the movies.
But as you get a little bit older, dating becomes more of a way to see what kind of person you might want to end up with. Or, in a lot of cases, exactly the kind of person you don't want to end up with.
It's about learning what works and doesn't work for you as you grow older and change. You go on sweet dates and make memories that you'll always have.
But then something shifts, or it should. You start dating to see who you want to spend the rest of your life with. Dating gets a little bit harder and you realize it isn't as easy ass it was in high school.
You're starting to treat every relationship like it could be long term. You start looking for people you're more compatible with and see yourself building a future with. You're going on better dates, you're spending weekends or nights together making memories and talking about the future.
But, to be quite honest, It's 2019 and we have turned dating on its head. And by that, I mean we have absolutely taken the sweet and romantic art of dating and flushed it down the toilet.
People no longer date now. They hang out with someone until they get tired of them or they hit a minor snag and then move on to the next. Or they hang out with multiple someones and not tell any of them until it all blows up.
The thought of thinking ahead into the future never occurs to anyone anymore. They aren't dating for love or partnership anymore. They're dating for convenience. But my question is, what is the point of that?
What is the point of going through partner after partner and never finding one you're truly interested in? Is it because you never really wanted to date anyone? I feel like rapid fire dating is lonely... and probably a solid breeding ground for disease.
When I got to college I had already dated enough boys to know what I really didn't want. I knew that when I started dating again it was going to be looking at it long term. There's no point in wasting my time going through relationships that I don't see going anywhere.
When I began my relationship I told my boyfriend that I date for the long term. Which meant that if we had a fight we were going to figure it out and come out stronger. There wasn't the option of jumping ship over something minor. He agreed.
The more our relationship progressed and the longer we were together I made a statement that I am dating with the potential to marry. I'm not looking to waste years of my life on someone I don't see in my future.
I want to be happy with someone and make memories that don't have to end up being with someone I used to know. I want stories I can tell my kids and a relationship that they can look up to. I'm not settling. I just know what I want.
I know that's a lot to throw at someone, but I'm honest. I don't like the dating culture in 2019 and I will never see the point of dating someone when you don't have your future in mind. It is a giant waste of everyone's time.
