During a conversation with some friends, the idea of clothing and what men find attractive for women to wear came to light. After talking for a few minutes it occurred to me, why do we feel the need to wear certain clothes for anyone other than ourselves? Especially men, who likely don’t know the difference between Tommy Hilfiger and Tommy Bahama, and lack appreciation for your sense of style.

In the same conversation, it was said that not only do men say “hey don’t you want to look good so you can meet a guy,” but it was other women encouraging the idea that you must wear something “sexy” or “revealing” in order to grab a man’s attention.

Sure, many of us deserve a night out where we feel beautiful and desirable, but it is unfair to ourselves to feel that is the only way to meet a potential partner. Besides, would you want to date someone who only seems to care about what you wear and how much you have shown? Your body should be something in which they respect, as you should respect it yourself.

My friends and I all came to an agreement that scandalous outfits are simply just not our style, and do not match our more conservative behavior, but why should that not be attractive or sexy? If anyone tries to tell you that a to-the-knee dress that modestly hugs your curves is less becoming than one where your butt cheeks make a guest appearance, they certainly do not know how to dress with class.

In addition to this general realization about beauty standards in the dating world, I thought about a story of my own. My boyfriend (of four years mind you) and I met a summer camp when we were 15. This summer camp consisted of outdoor activities all day long where we wore gym shorts and t-shirts while being drenched in sweat.

My personal testament to you Is that it does not take a revealing outfit to find the man of your dreams, but simply an attractive personality in which he admires. A partner should be someone who enjoys being around you in a messy bun and sweatpants but loves to see you dress up and feel confident as well.

Obviously, you are not likely to wear sweatpants out on a first date, but the point of this article is to encourage you to be yourself and not push your boundaries to do what you think others would like.

If your normal attire consists of booty shorts and tight dresses, have at it! More power to you. I am not one to judge; however, do not aim to build attraction off your exposed limbs and midsection, but rather base it off the chemistry and interests between you and another individual.