Please be advised that these poems contain dark imagery and may cause distress.

The world is dark and grey.

Day-in and day-out, all I see is the ever-looming darkness,

ready to take me in again.

It whispers in my ear,

"come back and you'll never be alone again."

I know the deceit too well, but the temptation sends shivers down my spine.

As I reach my hand out into the darkness, ready to never come back,

a bright light blinds me, it was the first time I saw you.

I realize that I already know you.

Did I miss something this whole time that I'm only seeing you now?

Did I never see this light that radiates off your body?

Have I been so focused on the darkness that I couldn't see the light in front of my eyes?

Why am I only seeing this now?

As you draw near, the sweet sound of your voice makes me faint.

You wave your hand in my face to get my attention,

but I sit there, dumbfounded.

What is happening?

I need to get away.

There's no escape with that glimmer in your eyes.

I'm trapped in my own body,

crying, screaming, trying to crawl out,

I am my own prisoner.

How can you not see that I'm no good?

I am the worst person there is,

but you see right through that.

Sounds of laughter fill the air.

I am a fraud.

The darkness creeps in,

caressing my shoulders, it leans in and whispers,

"you'll never be good enough, just stop now and come home with me."

Obedient as always, I excuse myself to be alone.

I know that the darkness will never leave me,

it's not like everyone else.

I knew that I could never choose the light.

It's in arms reach, but the darkness will never allow it.

I scream out for help,

but no one can hear.

Why can't I escape this dark creature?

This insufferable hell is all I know.

Do I even deserve any better?

Could you even save me?

When I see you, I smile, but I'm screaming inside.

Can't you see I need help?

We speak of everyday things, but all I can think of is your arms.

Wrapping me up, holding me tight, telling me everything is going to be alright.

The only arms I feel are wrapped around my neck.

Taking my breath away with every word I say to you.

I can never be free.

I can never tell you any of this.

I don't think I could handle that rejection.

Even though I've faced it plenty of times,

I can't risk your light going out.

It's the only time I can see the world in color.

This battle between light and dark takes over my thoughts.

Can I ever get away?

I am a dog on a leash, whenever I go too far, I'm pulled back in.

My master will never release these chains.

I feed off of attention,

but it keeps me malnourished.

I don't deserve your attention.

I tried to push you away.

I told you that I'm worthless,

undeserving,

stupid,

ugly,

and incapable of feelings.

But you shrugged it off and told me that I was wrong.

How could you be so delusional?

This darkness is slowly eating me alive,

I'm pretty much hollow.

Could your light even help me?

Would it be enough for the darkness to retreat away?

I'll reach out to you,

but would you even grab my hand?