Let’s get one thing straight first: women with curvy butts are usually considered the sexiest. Hell, one of the most memorable songs from the 90s was all about how “Baby Got Back.”
But when it comes to dressing that “back,” designers leave us out of the equation. Here are 4 clothing items designers need to learn how to make for the sexiest butts.
TIGHTS
The material used to make these things was not designed to cover big sexy butts. Most designers use the same thickness of material for our ankles that they do for the extra cushion of our backsides. This stretches the material until it's almost see-through.
We don’t want to give the public a peep show to our “glorious maximus.”
We demand thicker material be applied to the top of tights so that butts of all sizes can be adequately covered.
MINI-SKIRTS
I absolutely love mini skirts! I love the way they move and look. But the only time I feel comfortable wearing them is in the winter. Why? Because the designers don’t make the backs longer than the front, so what’s 4 inches above the knee in the front, will be 8 inches above the knee in the back!
Now don’t get me wrong. For ladies in commitments, this fact is great for playtime at home, but when we’re walking about in public we’re not trying to give everyone a peak.
And the reason winter is the only time we can wear mini-skirts is because we wear them with those tights I already talked about. In the winter, the mini skirt and tights solve each other’s visibility problems.
COME ON PEOPLE!
We deserve the right to wear mini-skirts in the summer too. I want to get sun on my legs everyday without the fear of my underwear showing.
JEANS
Thankfully there are designers who’ve stepped up and made great jeans for us ladies, but many still don’t. Ladies and gents of the fashion world, OUR WAISTS curve in, and our butts curve out. We are not those flat butt, no hip-having models on your runways. We are the ones who buy your clothes.
Design for the money if you won’t design for us.
Shout out to designers who are already making jeans for the sexiest shapes.
PANTIES
In the dark days before boy shorts were “a thing,” we curvy ladies had it rough. Briefs might as well have been thongs, because they NEVER stayed in place. They simply never had enough material to cover the assets.
And don’t even get me started on thongs. While they are great for the bedroom, they are murder on any woman who’s dared to wear them during the day.
Then the glorious day arrived and BOY SHORTS were created. These marvelous panties actually cover the whole butt of most women, PLUS they are apparently one of the sexiest styles according to most men. Go figure!
Plus, you can get them in see through, lace, and many other interesting fabrics and styles. This is one clothing item drama that may have been solved.
IN THE END,
This is a rant at designers who don’t make clothes for the sexiest of women. We the ladies of hourglass and pear shapes whose back ends have been the envy of many for decades (at least) and the desire of many others.