Chicago Cubs' Win Confirms Alternate Universe Theory | The Odyssey Online
Start writing a post
Sports

Chicago Cubs' Win Confirms Alternate Universe Theory

2014 Twitter Prediction Saves Billions from Death and Damnation

354
Chicago Cubs' Win Confirms Alternate Universe Theory
Twitter

Physicists confirmed Friday that the Chicago Cubs' 2016 World Series win is the solidest piece of evidence that we are living in an alternate universe since last year's notorious Barenstain Bears scandal.

Several individuals and groups are being given credit for accurately predicting the Cubs' victory years ahead of time, confounding scientists with their acuity and foresight.

One Twitter-based prediction, made November 4th, 2014, (almost exactly two years before the November 2nd World Series win) declared that the Cubs would face the Indians in the 2016 Series:

Notably, this prediction declared that the world would end in the middle of a tie in game seven.

Cleveland Pastoral Conference unofficially declared @RaysFanGio "the False Prophet" as early as Thursday morning, stating that the apocalypse prediction was inaccurate, but would nonetheless soon come to pass. The Conference further confirmed that its representatives unanimously agreed that this Day of Judgement would be November 9, 2016, and several of its members are making preparations.

According to Twitter, this man, Michael Lee, infamously predicted the Cubs' championship as early as 1993.

Mouths hanging open in expressions of mixed shock, awe, and horror, the pastoral conference was physically unable to comment on Lee's prediction.

Additionally, it should be noted that the comedy series "Parks and Recreation" predicted the Cubs' victory in a 2015 episode set in the summer of 2017.

Physicists claim that all these predictions serve as evidence that we are currently living in a parallel universe designed by at least one of these suspected masterminds. Some are even claiming that Doctor Strange's Eye of Agamotto was involved in arranging this breakdown of the universe's intricate workings.

Most convincing is the theory that @RaysFansGio actually altered the course of human history by posting the Tweet declaring the apocalypse's imminence as the Cubs made it to the World Series.

As written in Matthew 24:36, "No one knows the day or the hour" of Judgement Day.It is hypothesized that the end of the world was supposed to happen on November 2nd, 2016, but because of this prediction, the Cataclysm could no longer take place.

Hence, according to this theory, either the Apocalypse has taken a rain date, and we are at this very moment living in an alternate dimension in which the End Times have been delayed.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Thoughts While Studying For Finals
StableDiffusion


That time of the semester has arrived once again, finals. The worst week ever. Who thought it was a good idea for all your classes to have exams all in the same week? Definitely not me. Here's 20 thoughts you may have studying for finals.

Keep Reading...Show less
Entertainment

Disney magic for New Year!

The "Happiest Place on Earth" has a lot of characters with some pretty great advice.

5194
Disney magic kingdom castle on new years
StableDiffusion

Disney movies are well known and very popular in today's world. Although many people appreciate the plot and the storyline, not many people appreciate the wisdom these characters possess. Every Disney movie has unique advice that can be applied to everyday life. Here are 11 Disney quotes to help start your New Year off right:

Keep Reading...Show less
Lifestyle

40 Gift Ideas for the Indecisive

It's a time of love, family, memory-making, and gift-giving. But also a time of stressing over the perfect gift.

119431
Christmas gifts around a tree
StableDiffusion

It's officially December. There is less than a month of 2024, and I still feel like yesterday was summer. Now comes the merriest time of the year, the Christmas season.

Everyone has been waiting for this time of year since mid-October (which is way too early, in my opinion) or before. It's a time of love, family, memory-making, and gift-giving. A lot of times when I ask friends and family what they want, I get a lot of "I don't know" or "I don't care."

Keep Reading...Show less
Lifestyle

Bucket List To Live In The Now

Find excitement in your life and start exploring wherever you are right here, right now.

1280
mu bucket list

I was sitting at my cubicle, now that I am an adult, looking at the rain pouring down on the windowsill, bumming on life, wishing for the rain to just stop for a full day.

There are moments where we count down the hours until work is over and how many more days till the weekend, and this many weeks until something exciting. Or something like that? Well, I was bumming because my next day off from work is not until Memorial Day weekend, which is not until the end of May. And since this is my first year out of college being a “real person,” I am totally missing the winter, spring and summer breaks. I am sure all of us have felt this way even if just for a hot minute…

Keep Reading...Show less
Entertainment

11 Ways To Survive Finals As Told By Leslie Knope

Because you know you're going to be stressed out, and Leslie knows exactly how to survive.

920
Everything hurts and I'm dying

So finals are on their way. That's right everybody, finals are about to start.

But hey, don't panic. Start getting your affairs in order and prepare for a week of hell. Here's a few things Leslie Knope wants you to do to make your finals week just a little bit less stressful:

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments