"Don't cross oceans for someone who wouldn't jump puddles for you." I recently saw this tweet as I enjoyed one of my pre-bedtime scrolls, and was suddenly struck by something. I'd seen that tweet before. Not only had I seen that exact tweet, with that exact wording, but I'd seen hundreds of other tweets (and Facebook posts and Instagram captions) that followed a similar train of thought. Whether in reference to friends, family, romantic interests, or other relationships, my timelines had been frequently filled by people voicing similar discontent. "Why give so much to people who don't give anything back to you?" questioned another Twitter user. "Don't waste your time on people who don't appreciate your effort," urged a Facebook meme.
This sentiment, repeated over and over again on social media, seems to be indicative of how today's culture views love. The idea that your love for others should be dependent on what you get in return is mired in fear and a desperate desire for self-preservation. Loving people is a risk, and judging by this pervasive social media rhetoric, it's a risk that terrifies this generation. We advise ourselves to be slow to invest people so we're not hurt if we don't see the same investment in return. We're so interested in what we can get from others that we refuse to freely give. We say things like "Don't cross oceans for someone who wouldn't jump puddles for you," to excuse ourselves for being more interested in self-preservation than in other people.
Somewhere in today's culture, we've lost sight of the fact that generosity, kindness, and love are not about us. These are gifts that must be given without caveat or hope of reparation. We have to stop using love and generosity and kindness to hold people in our debt. Those who are most in need of these gifts may be the ones who can never repay us. So, for goodness sake, cross oceans for people regardless of what body of water they would jump for you. Allow yourself to care about people who may not even glance in your direction. Open up your heart. Stop keeping score. Love, generously and freely given, can be an unstoppable force for good in this world. It can radically change the lives of people around you. So give, and give gladly, and you may find the world gives back to you in ways you cannot imagine.