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25 Classic Dad Jokes So Cringeworthy They Actually Hurt

Bangs head against the wall

Sarah Maria Sena Soares

Sep 26, 2018

Rhode Island College

8562

25 Classic Dad Jokes So Cringeworthy They Actually Hurt

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Ah, dad jokes. Where would we be without them? We can't live with them and we can't live without them, and we always eye roll them when we hear them. One things for sure though, we love to hate them. You can't help but giggle along with the eye roll when a "good" dad joke is told.They're quirky and so bad that they're hilarious. Dad jokes stem from the sarcasm and goofiness that most fathers possess. With that being said here's cringe worthy dad jokes that actually hurt us.

1. What do you call cheese that's not yours?

Giphy

Nacho cheese.

2. Why do bees have sticky hair?

Giphy

Because they use honey combs.

3. Why can't you give Elsa a balloon?

Giphy

Because she will let it go.

4. What kind of shoes do ninjas wear?

Giphy

Sneakers, get it sneak.

5. What do you call a deer with no eyes?

Giphy

No idea. (No eye-d-a).

6. What do you call a bear with no teeth?

Giphy

A gummy bear.

7. Where do cows go on a date?

Giphy

To the moo-vies.

8. What do you call a pig that knows karate?

Giphy

A pork chop.

9. What do you call a fake noodle?

Giphy

An impasta.

10. Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Giphy

Because he was outstanding in his field.

11. How does a penguin build their houses?

Giphy

Igloo's it together.

12. What's brown and sticky?

Giphy

A stick.

13. Why can the bike stand up by itself?

Giphy

It was two tired.

14. What did the grape do when it was stepped on?

Giphy

It let out a little wine.

15. Dad can you put the dog out?

Giphy

"I didn't know the dog was on fire."

16. Did I tell you about the time I did a back flip?

Giphy

I was head over heels.

17. Wanna hear a joke about construction?

Giphy

"I'm still working on it."

18.Why did the coffee file a police report?

Giphy

Because it got mugged.

19. I'll call you later.

Giphy

"Don't call me Later, call me dad."

20. Wanna hear a joke about paper?

Giphy

Never mind it's tear-able.

21. How do you make a tissue dance?

Giphy

Put a little boogie in it.

22. How do you make holy water?

Giphy

You boil the hell out of it.

23. What do spiders do in their free time?

Giphy

Go on the web.

24. Dad, can you put my shoes on?

Giphy

"No, I don't think they'll fit me."

25. I'm hungry.

Giphy

"Hi Hungry, I'm dad."

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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25 Classic Dad Jokes So Cringeworthy They Actually Hurt

*Bangs head against the wall*

In This Article:

1. What do you call cheese that's not yours?

2. Why do bees have sticky hair?

3. Why can't you give Elsa a balloon?

4. What kind of shoes do ninjas wear?

5. What do you call a deer with no eyes?

6. What do you call a bear with no teeth?

7. Where do cows go on a date?

8. What do you call a pig that knows karate?

9. What do you call a fake noodle?

10. Why did the scarecrow win an award?

11. How does a penguin build their houses?

12. What's brown and sticky?

13. Why can the bike stand up by itself?

14. What did the grape do when it was stepped on?

15. Dad can you put the dog out?

16. Did I tell you about the time I did a back flip?

17. Wanna hear a joke about construction?

18.Why did the coffee file a police report?

19. I'll call you later.

20. Wanna hear a joke about paper?

21. How do you make a tissue dance?

22. How do you make holy water?

23. What do spiders do in their free time?

24. Dad, can you put my shoes on?

25. I'm hungry.

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Think of everything that you've heard about college... and completely forget it.

1. If you thought that you knew how to study, you're wrong.

2. So you're living with a stranger...

3. You will lose some of your high school friends.

4. New friends are amazing!

5. You will feel like a visitor at home.

6. Embrace the party scene... or not.

7. FOMO is very real and you will feel every bit of it.

8. A good-night's sleep? What is that?

9. The "Freshman 15" is a myth... Sort of.

10. There's nothing better than a fresh start.

11. Yes, it will be the best years of your life!

Moms: the only reason voicemail still exists.

1. Leaves you voice mails.

2. When you answer, the phone says, "Hey it's Mom!", even though you have caller ID.

3. Tells you things about your friends she found out on Facebook.

4. Fast-forwards through sex scenes.

5. Asks you what really provocative song lyrics mean.

6. Comments on everything you post online.

7. Asks you if you are seeing anyone.

8. Tells you what she had for dinner when you aren't home.

9. Asks you the same question over and over.

10. Tells you you need a haircut.

11. Tells you you need to start eating more.

12. Snoops on your life.

13. Wakes you up in the morning in that annoying calm voice.

14. Tells you she's proud of you about everything.

15. Uses lingo in the dorkiest way.

16. Asks you to vote for her favorite contestants on 'American Idol,' 'Dancing with the Stars,' or 'The Voice.'

17. Makes a ridiculous amount of snacks when your friends come over.

18. Loves you unconditionally.

Blonde hair, don't care!

1. Mentally preparing yourself to convince your hair dresser that white is the way to go.

2. Or the anxiety of what could go wrong by bleaching your hair at home.

3. You could either become a ginger

4. Or a pixie

5. The face you make in the mirror when you take off your towel to unveil the perfect white strands.

6. Taking a million selfies the day you bleached it, because you know your roots will be back in literally 2 days.

7. Having to get bangs or a big chop because your hair is so damaged.

8. Having orange highlights in between touch-ups.

9. Going out for a drink afterwards to debut your updated look.

As told by "Parks and Recreation" GIFs.

"Uh? Eating? Am I Eating? Yeah..."

"Oh, yeah. I've been eating super healthy"

"Sorry, I can't talk! I'm studying!"

"I aced my final! No worries!"

"My grades? Uh..my professor hasn't updated them in awhile.."

"Everyone failed that test. Not just me!"

"I go to class literally every day. I'm NEVER late"

"I really try to just spend money on necessities.."

Bangs head against the wall

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