Humanity thrives on boundaries. We all have to abide by the law and obey authority figures. But what about the boundaries you get to create? These kinds of boundaries are vital for your mental health and necessary for healthy relationships.
It's important to draw clear lines and not let anyone try to redraw what you already established. Weak boundaries invite others to take you for granted. This will steal your energy and precious time. They can also open the door to emotional pain and lead to dependency on other's affirmation. Strong boundaries show you have self-respect and stand firm for what you deserve. They allow you to be kind to yourself.
Don't spread yourself too thin. You don't have to go to every event you are invited to. Just because you want to be involved in multiple groups does not mean you need to plan for more than your schedule can hold. Constantly rushing to one thing after another is draining. Find what is most important and wholeheartedly invest into those people and hobbies. It's better to give of yourself deeply than to be stretched wide to reach all the people you want to please. There is only so much of you to go around.
Remember you aren't obligated to say yes. It's nice to be the friend that goes above and beyond. Jesus calls us to be selfless. However, you shouldn't give to the point that your peace is taken out from under you. Know what you can handle and how much is enough. You aren't a rude person if you say no to an unreasonable request. Don't forget to do what is good for you, too. How you feel matters more than maintaining an always say yes lifestyle.
Stand up for yourself. You can be humble and not be a pushover. If someone says something that hurts your feelings, it's important to speak up. If they continue to hurt you because you keep laughing off their humor-coated insults, it's on you. As Brene Brown said, "Don't shrink. Don't puff up. Just stand your sacred ground." If you disagree with something going on, staying silent is participation by omission. Voice your opinions. What you have to say matters more than avoiding the tension of conflicts.
Setting boundaries is a critical social skill. It shows you respect yourself. When you value your sense of identity, so will others. Your healthy relationships will flourish when you consistently use self-care.
