I moved from a very small town in Delaware to a relatively large city in Virginia for college. I was more excited for this than anything I had ever been excited for in my entire life; I have always hated the small-town life, especially the town that I grew up in, so to move from a town with roughly eight thousand people in fifteen total square miles to a city with more than eighty thousand people was exhilarating. I did not think I would miss my hometown and now, exactly seven months later, I can say that I was right. I do not miss it. Not for the most part, anyway. But there are a few things in particular that I have realized I do miss as I have been going through this transition:
1. My hometown friends
Over the years I have not exactly maintained the greatest long-lasting connections with the people I grew up with. Once I graduated high school, I realized that the only reason a lot of friendships are made at that age is because you see each other for five days a week for twelve years, and the town is small. My graduating class had 108 people in it. Social media is great for making sure that everyone in your hometown does not think you’re an uppity b**** by cutting them out of your life but without the need to actually spend time face--to--face with them when you are on your fall break and only have enough time to hand out with your best friends. And that is what you’ll want to do most; give them a huge hug and catch up on all the smaller details and events that have happened in their lives since you last say them. People warn you about this: the longing and fear of missing out in your friends’ lives when this distance and how happy you’ll be once you guys see each other again. Absence really does make the heart grow fonder. But while it yearns for you, it also is searching for someone to fill the place in their life you carved out when you left. And while you’re happy that they are happy and living their lives, it also aches a little bit to see someone being able to hang out with your best friend the same way you two hung out so many times when you lived six miles away from each other instead of more than three hundred.
2.The familiarity
Chances are if you are from a small town, you learned how to drive at a really young age because there is no such thing as actual public transportation in small towns. You know every nook and cranny of your town, which roads to avoid when it’s Sunday at two in the afternoon or Wednesday during the 5 p.m. after work rush and where the cops’ speed traps are. You know which Chinese takeout place has less oily lo mein and which convenience store has the best slushies. You run into your old teachers at the grocery store all the time. That feeling of comfortable familiarity just does not exist when you move to a new place, especially if your new city is five times the size of your hometown. There is a level of unease that comes with having to navigate a new city and learn all of it’s tricks. You find yourself craving the easiness with which you drove around the areas you know by heart and were absolutely sure about the direction you were moving your tires.
3.The stars
This one is a surprise to me. I took the stars for granted growing up. I lived in the country so late at night I could look up on a clear night and see an infinite swirl of stars and I didn’t realize how much I’d miss it until I look up on a clear night now and only see the most prominent stars due to all the light pollution a big city brings. Do not get me wrong! I love that my college values safety so much that there is not really a completely dark spot on campus, but that does not lend itself well to nighttime starlight. It’s not something you normally think about until it is not there anymore.
4.Your moms cooking
It took two months for me to get properly homesick. The chilly weather had just set in and on a random Saturday brunch, I almost cried in the middle of the cafeteria. All I wanted to eat was my mom's apple pancake casserole and it would be a whole month before I could be home again. Whenever I get homesick it is nearly always because I miss my mom’s cooking. Cafeteria food gets old after a while.
I would not trade my college for the world. I love my school so much and I am happy with the decision that I made to move away and get my degree. However, being back home after a long time away is often just what I need to recharge my soul while I am away from campus.