December 23, 2016.

Yesterday was your birthday.

The only birthday that I vaguely remember was when Mom and I came to visit just to give you a whopper from Burger King and a gift card. I remember you really crying your eyes out too. I never understood why you used to get so emotional when someone would do the smallest gesture for you, but now I believe I completely understand.

You were the rock of the family. You were the one that maintained Thanksgiving and Christmas dinners just to see your kids and your grandchildren all come together. You were the one that made sure that everyone was on good terms and that they kept in contact. Now, I can tell you that I perceive that as strong, even though it is considered to be so simple to some people. You never took ‘no’ for an answer and fought your way the best you possibly could. I’ve always admired that about you, too. Your will to fight. On God, you fought and you fought back hard and as long as you could.

Looking back now, I now adore how hard you loved and how you were not in any sort of the word afraid to show it. And see, gram that’s the ‘thing’ now. Being distant and nonchalant is something that is considered to be the norm. You would flip if you seen all what is going on.

Adversity was something that we faced, just like any other family and you always made sure if everyone was okay or if we were even comfortable. You protected us. You were always the one to listen when we needed someone to come cry to. 3PM or 5AM, you were always ready.

With that, I can’t tell you how much I miss your talks. I was young at the time, so I didn’t appreciate them as much as I could’ve but it wasn’t transparent that they were always genuine and wise and I could only thank you for all of the times you’ve sat down with me for hours upon hours to tell me the

I wish you could’ve met me at my lowest and saw me when I found new passions. I wish that you could have experienced your grandchildren graduate high school and see all that they have and will accomplish.

I hope all that I’m doing is enough. I miss you.