Could Polyamory Work For You | The Odyssey Online
Start writing a post
Relationships

Could Polyamory Work For You

For some, polyamory can challenge how one thinks of commitment, love, and jealousy, maybe even for the better.

107
Could Polyamory Work For You
Starcasm

When you imagine a functional romantic relationship, what do you picture? I know my mind immediately goes to an image of a monogamous couple. However, an estimated four to five percent of Americans have fulfilling, consensual relationships with more than one person.

Polyamory is the idea or practice of being romantically involved with more than one person at the same time. Polyamory is not the same as swinging. Swingers have recreational sex with multiple people. Meanwhile, a polyamorous person focuses on developing deep relationships, in which sex may be involved but is definitely not the focus. Polyamory is not the same as cheating because polyamorous relationships require the knowledge and consent of all partners.

The reason I find the concept of polyamory so fascinating is because it completely overturns our conventional idea of what a relationship is. It challenges the belief that romantic relationships can only exist between two people. While monogamous relationships are perfect for some people, polyamorous relationships are just as valid and actually work better for others.

There is a common misconception that if you love someone, you shouldn’t want to be with anyone else. Many believe that if you love multiple people, your love is divided and therefore not as complete. This idea is based on the “starvation model” of love, which conveys love as a limited commodity. In reality, we have more than enough love within our hearts to give ourselves fully to more than one partner, just as we have more than enough love to give to more than one friend. Why is it socially acceptable to have more than one close friend, but taboo to have more than one romantic partner? Making a new friend doesn’t mean you love your other friends any less, just as developing a new romantic relationship doesn’t invalidate your current one.

Again, it is crucial that everyone involved in a poly relationship knows and understands the rules of the relationship. These rules may vary from relationship to relationship, but the most important thing is that they are clearly defined and respected by those involved. Polyamory requires complete trust. It is possible to cheat in a polyamorous relationship. Breaking certain rules of the relationship is still considered cheating; in fact, cheating in a poly relationship can be even more destructive than cheating in a monogamous one because more than one person is hurt as a result.

One of the biggest things to overcome in a poly relationship is jealousy. Jealousy occurs when someone feels insecure or threatened in a relationship. Therefore, jealousy is just a symptom of larger relationship problems. The key to making the relationship work is to express your fears and insecurities openly and immediately with your partners, so they can help you feel more secure in your relationship. Instead of attributing your jealousy to your partner’s other relationship and trying to regulate what he/she/them can or cannot do with his/her/their other partner, evaluate what you aren’t getting out of your own relationship and make a conscious effort to communicate your feelings of jealousy to your partner every step of the way. For those who are interested in exploring polyamorous relationships, this is an incredible and more specific source on to how to navigate jealousy.

When it comes to sex, a study by the Journal of Sexual Health found that individuals in consensually non monogamous relationships were more likely to practice safe and protected sex than individuals cheating in a monogamous relationship. This may be because individuals in polyamorous relationships consent to outside sex as long as it is safe, while cheaters skip condoms because it makes their unfaithful actions feel more premeditated. Cheaters are also more likely to be drunk or on drugs during outside sexual encounters, increasing risk of unsafe sex.

Although polyamory is still widely unaccepted, as college hookup culture picks up, so does the notion of consensual non monogamy. This type of relationship certainly does not work for everyone, but for some, polyamory can challenge how they think of commitment, love, and jealousy, maybe even for the better.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Featured

15 Mind-Bending Riddles

Hopefully they will make you laugh.

190441
 Ilistrated image of the planet and images of questions
StableDiffusion

I've been super busy lately with school work, studying, etc. Besides the fact that I do nothing but AP chemistry and AP economics, I constantly think of stupid questions that are almost impossible to answer. So, maybe you could answer them for me, and if not then we can both wonder what the answers to these 15 questions could be.

Keep Reading...Show less
Entertainment

Most Epic Aurora Borealis Photos: October 2024

As if May wasn't enough, a truly spectacular Northern Lights show lit up the sky on Oct. 10, 2024

15033
stunning aurora borealis display over a forest of trees and lake
StableDiffusion

From sea to shining sea, the United States was uniquely positioned for an incredible Aurora Borealis display on Thursday, Oct. 10, 2024, going into Friday, Oct. 11.

It was the second time this year after an historic geomagnetic storm in May 2024. Those Northern Lights were visible in Europe and North America, just like this latest rendition.

Keep Reading...Show less
 silhouette of a woman on the beach at sunrise
StableDiffusion

Content warning: This article contains descriptions of suicide/suicidal thoughts.

When you are feeling down, please know that there are many reasons to keep living.

Keep Reading...Show less
Relationships

Power of Love Letters

I don't think I say it enough...

457951
Illistrated image of a letter with 2 red hearts
StableDiffusion

To My Loving Boyfriend,

  • Thank you for all that you do for me
  • Thank you for working through disagreements with me
  • Thank you for always supporting me
  • I appreciate you more than words can express
  • You have helped me grow and become a better person
  • I can't wait to see where life takes us next
  • I promise to cherish every moment with you
  • Thank you for being my best friend and confidante
  • I love you and everything you do

To start off, here's something I don't say nearly enough: thank you. Thank you, thank you, thank you from the bottom of my heart. You do so much for me that I can't even put into words how much I appreciate everything you do - and have done - for me over the course of our relationship so far. While every couple has their fair share of tiffs and disagreements, thank you for getting through all of them with me and making us a better couple at the other end. With any argument, we don't just throw in the towel and say we're done, but we work towards a solution that puts us in a greater place each day. Thank you for always working with me and never giving up on us.

Keep Reading...Show less
Lifestyle

11 Signs You Grew Up In Hauppauge, NY

Because no one ever really leaves.

26689
Map of Hauppauge, New York
Google

Ah, yes, good old Hauppauge. We are that town in the dead center of Long Island that barely anyone knows how to pronounce unless they're from the town itself or live in a nearby area. Hauppauge is home to people of all kinds. We always have new families joining the community but honestly, the majority of the town is filled with people who never leave (high school alumni) and elders who have raised their kids here. Around the town, there are some just some landmarks and places that only the people of Hauppauge will ever understand the importance or even the annoyance of.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments