You Are The Only One Who Can Determine What Coping Strategy Works | The Odyssey Online
Start writing a post
Health and Wellness

Nobody Gets To Determine How You Cope With Trauma Except For You

If you are not going to support me through my healing process or believe "I am handling this all wrong," then please get out of my life.

306
Nobody Gets To Determine How You Cope With Trauma Except For You

Obviously, if I am causing bodily harm to myself, I want someone to stop me. I want someone to be there to guide me towards a better coping mechanism where I can fully process the pain I've been through. However, nobody gets the right to stand in the way of processing my own trauma.

For me, writing has always been an outlet. I was able to describe to my mom the first counts of where I felt depressed through my writing. I wrote an open letter to a relative who emotionally abused me during my childhood as a way to cope. And now, I've used my writing to process the pain so called "best friends" put me through over the last year of my life. I didn't realize all the damage that has been done until I walked away.

I've never been good at verbalizing how I am feeling. I hate being vulnerable with people because I do not want to appear as weak nor do I feel comfortable opening up with people right away. I have trust issues I'm still learning to overcome.

Side note: if you're one of my friends and I have expressed how hurt I am or you have seen me cry congratulations. You're among the very few.

Anyways, writing is one of my coping mechanisms I learned in therapy helps me collect my thoughts, reflect, and process whatever situation I am going through.

I've also learned to use my writing as a form of advocation. I hope that people when they read my articles or whatever I publish, they can learn and grow from my mistakes. I also hope that if they are facing a similar scenario, they feel less alone. I've always turned towards blogs or YouTube videos where people openly discuss what they are going through. It's a form of emotional connection and just overall relief when someone feels the same.

That has always and will forever be my intention. Whether certain people want to believe that or not.

Recently, I've had people who I believed were close to me try to talk me out of my coping strategy. They haven't walked in my shoes and apparently haven't listened to my perspective on situations - how hurt I was. I've been called overdramatic or lying about a situation for pity. If that were only the case.

Sometimes, people do not like hearing the truth because they realize they are part of the problem. And that's on them, not me. It isn't my fault they feel guilty. Quite frankly, if you are a subject of my articles and I describe what you have put me through, I hope you feel uncomfortable. There are two sides to every story, and if they do not want to hear my side anymore, that's okay.

However, I hope you take what I say as an opportunity to learn and grow. I would if the roles were reversed because I would become aware that maybe things aren't the way I believe them to be. It's a chance to make right of the wrong, or at least give it a dam try. We all have progressed through life to be better versions of ourselves. That's the beauty of evolving.

If you are not going to support me through my healing process or believe "I am handling this all wrong," then please get out of my life. I do not need your negative energy any longer clouding up my well-being as I try moving on and being happier.

By messaging me your disapproval in my coping, that is a reflection on you. Not on me.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Featured

15 Mind-Bending Riddles

Hopefully they will make you laugh.

189956
 Ilistrated image of the planet and images of questions
StableDiffusion

I've been super busy lately with school work, studying, etc. Besides the fact that I do nothing but AP chemistry and AP economics, I constantly think of stupid questions that are almost impossible to answer. So, maybe you could answer them for me, and if not then we can both wonder what the answers to these 15 questions could be.

Keep Reading...Show less
Entertainment

Most Epic Aurora Borealis Photos: October 2024

As if May wasn't enough, a truly spectacular Northern Lights show lit up the sky on Oct. 10, 2024

14750
stunning aurora borealis display over a forest of trees and lake
StableDiffusion

From sea to shining sea, the United States was uniquely positioned for an incredible Aurora Borealis display on Thursday, Oct. 10, 2024, going into Friday, Oct. 11.

It was the second time this year after an historic geomagnetic storm in May 2024. Those Northern Lights were visible in Europe and North America, just like this latest rendition.

Keep Reading...Show less
 silhouette of a woman on the beach at sunrise
StableDiffusion

Content warning: This article contains descriptions of suicide/suicidal thoughts.

When you are feeling down, please know that there are many reasons to keep living.

Keep Reading...Show less
Relationships

Power of Love Letters

I don't think I say it enough...

457727
Illistrated image of a letter with 2 red hearts
StableDiffusion

To My Loving Boyfriend,

  • Thank you for all that you do for me
  • Thank you for working through disagreements with me
  • Thank you for always supporting me
  • I appreciate you more than words can express
  • You have helped me grow and become a better person
  • I can't wait to see where life takes us next
  • I promise to cherish every moment with you
  • Thank you for being my best friend and confidante
  • I love you and everything you do

To start off, here's something I don't say nearly enough: thank you. Thank you, thank you, thank you from the bottom of my heart. You do so much for me that I can't even put into words how much I appreciate everything you do - and have done - for me over the course of our relationship so far. While every couple has their fair share of tiffs and disagreements, thank you for getting through all of them with me and making us a better couple at the other end. With any argument, we don't just throw in the towel and say we're done, but we work towards a solution that puts us in a greater place each day. Thank you for always working with me and never giving up on us.

Keep Reading...Show less
Lifestyle

11 Signs You Grew Up In Hauppauge, NY

Because no one ever really leaves.

26565
Map of Hauppauge, New York
Google

Ah, yes, good old Hauppauge. We are that town in the dead center of Long Island that barely anyone knows how to pronounce unless they're from the town itself or live in a nearby area. Hauppauge is home to people of all kinds. We always have new families joining the community but honestly, the majority of the town is filled with people who never leave (high school alumni) and elders who have raised their kids here. Around the town, there are some just some landmarks and places that only the people of Hauppauge will ever understand the importance or even the annoyance of.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments