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Conversations you might hear at your thanksgiving dinner table

What are your plans after graduation---I'm going to stop you right there.

Maggie Reid

Nov 13, 2017

Utica College

Conversations you might hear at your thanksgiving dinner table

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Thanksgiving. The day is usually filled with copious amounts of turkey, stuffing, and conversations you rather not have. Family is great--but we all have our own views on certain things, which can get pretty heated fast.

1) Relationship status

No, Aunt so and so, I am still single. You follow me on Facebook, we've been over this. Please stop commenting on my posts when there is a guy in them. They're just my friends.

2) Plans after college

Please--I'm going to stop you right there. This is a day for me to stuff my face and gain nearly 10 pounds from eating too much pie--which I am going to have for breakfast by the way because I am an adult. At least I tell myself that. I have so much assignments due next week that I haven't even thought about starting, and finals week starts so soon and I am not prepared. I can't even make my own doctor's appointments without consulting my mother, do you really think I have my life together enough to know what I'm doing after college?

3) Politics

There is always someone that has to ruin the quiet family affair by getting into politics. I'm trying to eat my turkey, I rather not argue with you right now. Which I definitely will if you start first. What is it about alcohol that makes people think it is a good idea to start yelling in each other's faces?

4) War on women

The one conversation I always bring up during Thanksgiving is the right for a woman to have control over her own body. Everyone is entitled to their own opinions, which they are and that is great, but not when it comes to controlling someone else's body who they don't even know. I don't care who you voted for, or what religion, believe what you want. But your beliefs should not take a way a choice for a woman to make for herself. And this is the one issue I will argue for until morning about, uncle Peter, I've got all night.

5) Woke

All this arguing usually leads to the younger people at my Thanksgiving table asking the older members of our family why they aren't woke about certain issues.

6) Can you pass the...

probably the most unproblematic conversation you will be hearing this Thanksgiving.

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Conversations you might hear at your thanksgiving dinner table

What are your plans after graduation---I'm going to stop you right there.

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This isn't just for the single Pringles out there either, folks

Run Around Clanging Pots and Pans in Everyone's Face

Eat the Last Few Pigs in a Blanket

Pop Twelve White Grapes

Burn Something

Smash Things Against a Wall

Spontaneously Begin an Irish Jig

Call Your Mother

Throw a Coffee Table Out a Window

Sing "Auld Lang Syne" at the Top of Your Lungs

Do Some Squats

Swan Dive into a Nearly Freezing Body of Water

Take a Shot

Time to be merry and bright.

"First Noel" by Leslie Odom, Jr

"A Holly Jolly Christmas" by Burl Ives

"Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas" by Kelly Clarkson

"All I Want for Christmas Is You" by Mariah Carey

"Christmas (Baby Please Come Home" by Michael Buble

"Last Christmas" by Taylor Swift

"The Christmas Song" by Josh Groban

"White Christmas" by Idina Menzel

"O Holy Night" by David Archuleta

"Believe" by Josh Groban

"Les cloches du hameau" by Celine Dion

Or at least try to do.

1. I will wake up (sorta) on time for class.

2. I will look decent for class.

3. I will go to the gym more.

4. I will go to the library and study more.

5. I will meet new people.

For those long nights that turn into mornings when the struggle is real.

1. Walk in motivated and ready to rock

2. Disappointed you let it get this bad

3. Distracted: When a 10-Minute Break Becomes an Hour

4. When the Yearning for Sleep Sneaks Up

5. In the words of Lorelai Gilmore "Coffee, Coffee, Coffee"

Oh, so done.

You need sleep, but also have 13 things due in the span of 4 days.

1. When it's December 1 and you have seven things due, three exams, and haven't slept in three days.

2. So you stress.

3. And cry.

4. Then call your mom to cry some more.

5. After the pep talk, you feel determined to get everything done.

6. But, now you're tired.

7. And really hungry.

8. Suddenly, it's 2 a.m. and you have only written three sentences and your paper is due in the morning.

9. You've made it to Friday... somehow.

10. Then Sunday hits and you find yourself back at the Lib.

11. So you cry some more.

12. But, you fight through the tears to get everything done because you're determined.

13. In the end, you feel on top of the world because you made it through the last week of class alive.

14. But, now it's finals week so good luck.

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