Holiday dinners can go two ways: Either really well or it can become a tragic meal of everyone quietly stuffing their faces while mumbling passive aggressive remarks under their breath.
Isn't that what the holidays are for?
If you want to actually have a peaceful dinner with your loved ones, I am here to help.
Here are 10 conversation topics to avoid like the plague:
1. So, do you have a boyfriend/girlfriend?
Can also be interchangeable with, "When are you getting married?" Especially with me having my Hispanic family over for dinner, I always get the dreaded, "So why don't you have a boyfriend?". Grandma, I probably don't have one because of the way I'm eating my mashed potatoes right now. LEAVE ME ALONE.
2. Politics
This is just a no-no. Do I even have to say anything else?
3. The food quality
Listen, your mother/father/grandma has been cooking since 6 am to deliver this giant feast. There's no time to complain that the turkey is dry, just eat the food. Don't even try to say, "I should've made the turkey". If you really wanted to, you would have, but I bet you would've been too lazy to.
4. The "Did you find a job yet?" question
Yes, no, maybe, I'm working on it. Whatever the answer may be, we just want to eat and not worry about that.
5. Religion
Being that Thanksgiving is not a religious holiday, why discuss religion? We are all here to be amongst family and to be thankful for what we have, an argument about religious differences is just going to ruin that.
6. Family drama
Ok, so your Aunt is going through a messy divorce and they're trying to figure out who gets the dog. It's a juicy topic for everyone and they want to know every detail, but it is not the time to bring it up!
7. The amount of food someone is eating
You're sitting here, I'm sitting here, there's a table full of food in front of me, what else do you expect me to do? I wore stretchy pants for a reason!
8. Someone's appearance
Did your cousin come in wearing a hideous sweater vest? Did your uncle put on a lot of weight? Ignore it and move on. Don't bring it up! You're just asking for a fight.
9. Accusatory subjects
"Mom, how come you never tucked me in at night and read me a story?" "Dad, you still owe me $5 bucks". Don't bring it up now!
10. Stories that will make everyone cry
I don't think anyone wants to cry during the holidays, especially in front of everyone. Let's talk about happy things!
Follow these rules and you'll have a great Holiday season and can eat in peace. While your dad is carving the turkey, be careful about what you choose to bring up. Remember, he is holding the knife!