In addition to the adorable puppy videos, Christmas recipe ideas, and the usual status updates and photos that decorate my Facebook timeline, I have seen quite a few posts lately that are targeting women for what they wear, or rather, what they are not wearing, in the photos they post to their social media profiles.
The posts I have seen, made by men and women alike, are referring to individuals who post “half-naked” pictures. This term applies to photos in which the individual is wearing what some consider to be the bare minimum of clothing: tight, tiny shorts and a sports bra; leggings with crop tops; or even a bra and underwear set. The derogatory posts say things about these women such as “have some self-respect” or “if you post half naked photos, you must be a [slut/hoe/insert slur to demean a woman’s sexuality here]”, but do not offer explanations as to why they assume those who post these photos have no self-respect or choose to sleep around.
With a present day culture that is quick to sexualize nudity, particularly female nudity, we automatically correlate bare skin to sex and promiscuity. Additionally, sex is seen as an intimate, private matter by many, so publicly posting bare skin must mean you are public and bold about your sexuality as well, right? Wrong. What a person wears, or what they are not wearing, in a photo says nothing about how much sex they have (if any!), who they’re having it with, and whether or not they frequently have numerous sexual partners. Furthermore, it is impossible for an outsider to define someone else’s level of self-respect; to do so is to contradict its very definition. According to dictionary.com, the definition of “self-respect” is “pride and confidence in oneself; a feeling that one is behaving with honor and dignity.” Some choose to display their sense of pride, both in public and in online photos, by dressing modestly. Others show their confidence by dressing in a manner that exposes more skin, but visible skin does not equate to promiscuity. Rather, the individual’s choice to wear revealing clothing can be a way to portray their inner confidence and self-dignity. No one is able to decide how another defines self-respect or how they express it.
It is also important to keep in mind that not everyone utilizes fashion to exhibit their confidence. On a personal level, I derive much of my self-respect from my writing and from my actions; I feel as though it is more important to act with dignity than to dress with dignity. Although I do feel confident when I dress up and look good, I do not rely on fashion as a means to gain honor and respect. My clothing choices tend to fall on the moderate side, but this is simply my style, not because I believe dressing in a revealing way betrays my self-respect. In the same way, those that wear more revealing clothes than I may not gain any self-respect from doing so, that just may be their own sense of style.
My advice? If you catch yourself thinking “wow, she really needs to put some clothes on!” when you see a picture online, take a mental step back and ask yourself: Does my personal dress code apply to everyone else? Is it possible that the person posting said photo finds empowerment in sharing it, just as you may find your own personal empowerment through fashion, work, sports, or another hobby? Does the picture explicitly state that she sleeps with multiple people? As long as she’s not having sex in the photo, terms like “hoe,” “thot,” or “slut” have absolutely no justification and no place whatsoever in the photo’s comment section. Clothing and social media posts define nothing about an individual’s sexual tendencies; only they can do that for themselves. So before you leave a comment or make a post about others gaining some self-respect, ensure that you aren’t slandering your own dignity by attempting to define the dignity of others.