Premarital sex is now a common activity. What’s also very common is making the mistake on whom you are having sex for the first time with. Before having sex, some think, “Yes, I think he/she is the best person to whom I give my virginity to,” but then the next day or after you end whatever you had with them, you’ll regret it. I’m not saying this happens to everyone, but it is more common than you think. If you’re contemplating on if you should give up your virginity to someone, you ask yourself these questions before participating in sex for the first time.

First, you must think if you’re seriously not going to regret if you make this decision to have sex. I know it’s difficult when you’re in the action, but maybe think about it before even that day comes. Think long and hard. “Is this the person who I want my first time to be with?” As they say, “There are plenty of fish in the sea.” It is true, there are, so there might be someone who is much better to share your virginity with. If you’re the type of person who you want to just get it over with, it’s still important to think if that person is the type of person you want to get it over with. Are you okay if they will forget all about you afterwards? Are you okay if you’re not going to be in a relationship with them? If you’re friends, will it be awkward seeing them and talking knowing you had sex with them? You have to think every type of situation that could happen if you’re going to “get it over with” with that person.

If you’re religious, you might want to think about what your religion tells you about premarital sex. My friend, who is a very strict Mormon, tells me about how she wants to save herself for marriage. I ask why, and she tells me all about her religion. She told me, basically, how if she did have premarital sex, then she wouldn’t feel as close to God as she does now. If you’re very religious, go with what God says in the Bible. If you don’t, you might feel that God might not love you anymore. Stay with your belief, it is a much better decision.

If you’re in a relationship, you must think, “Is it too soon?” If you’re in a long term relationship, you don’t have to have sex as soon as possible. You can have a wonderful relationship without sex. In my opinion, sex is something that is only shared between two people who love each other and trust. If you and the other person fall in love, that doesn’t immediately mean you have to have sex right when you say “I love you.” Wait until you feel it is the right time. If you truly love each other, then the person you’re with will understand and is willing to wait with you.

Another thing to remember if you’re in a relationship is, “Am I being pressured?” Sometimes, the other person is pressuring you to have sex. Do not ever give in if you’re not ready. You will regret it if you decide to give in. It’s guaranteed. If you are not ready, then you are not ready. In addition, do not be with someone who is pressuring you into having sex. That person is going to use you and then throw you away like trash and forget all about you. It is your first time, and that person does not deserve to be the one who takes your virginity.

We all see something related to sex every day, where it is idolized and encouraged. Although you hear about how you need to stay protected when having sex, people never speak how to stop yourself before acting on sex. Although this article leans more towards the topic of virginity, a few of these questions I said above can also be used for someone who is not a virgin and is about engage in sex.