You’ve made it through the first week or two of classes. You are finally starting to figure out which classes you can make it on time to even if you wait until the last possible second to leave your bed while realizing that the other classes across campus not only require a million dollar textbook, but also snacks, a 6 AM wake-up call - and extra deodorant - to get through. But, hey, you’re doing it! College is equally as fun as it is challenging and although you were homesick at first, you are adjusting to your new schedule – and roommate – and it’s working out fairly well.
Let’s face it; college isn’t like the movies, though. This should be neither disappointing nor surprising because what truly is like a movie? Nothing.
Whether it’s trouble with adjusting to sharing a bathroom with an entire floor of strangers or just remembering to eat dinner at a normal time, college is all about adjustment and responsibility. It’s a wild time in our lives, and I mean that in a not-so-party-like way. We just got used to raising our hands to go to the restroom in high school to now being left alone to do anything we want, whenever we want. There’s a happy medium that you will find soon. I promise. One too many way too late nights of ordering pizza with your suite mates and taking naps to make up for it during the day in between your class ending and your roommate coming home for exactly 33 minutes will catch up to you. Yes, you will find that exact, tiny amount of time may just be the only good sleep you’ll get sometimes, but that will also get better. You'll even realize that your planner is bursting with pen and highlighter trying to organize everything from classes to assignments to the first meetings to new organizations. Campus is home to so many clubs, and offers endless ways to become involved, but how do you choose? How will you know someone in these clubs that can steer you in the right direction of what you're looking for? And the time to commit to these things, where will you find it? It's overwhelming when it all hits you at once.
You’ll soon enough realize that everyone is going through these struggles, and you are not alone. Hang in there because something amazing is coming.
You see flyers for it, you hear women in your classes talking about it, and you keep wondering about it.
Recruitment. Is it for me?
Regardless of if you even end up liking anywhere enough to choose letters – which I promise you, you will - try it out.
OK, I know what you’re thinking. Enough with the bullsh*t everyone else is feeding me. I’m sure you’ve heard it all. “If I paid for my sisters, I haven’t paid nearly enough.” Really? Paying for friends? “Sisterhood is not something you understand until you experience it for yourself.” Yeah, sure. “Philanthropy is what we pride ourselves in most.” Ha, okay.
It’s real. All of the crap they say about it – is absolutely true.
I’ll let you take that in for a minute because I know, you think you’ve heard it all, but you haven’t.
For an entire year I was so consumed with the creating the “perfect college experience,” but that is completely garbage- mostly because that doesn’t exist and also because I was closing the door to so many opportunities. As I was starting to make new friends and go new places, I didn’t want to “waste” my time getting dressed up and dedicating so many hours meeting even more complete strangers - who I could’ve never imagined calling “my sisters” let alone “friends.” The clapping, the singing, the waving, it was a little overwhelming.
I was wrong, and I wasted an entire year of college figuring that out. I realized what I was missing out on, and I went through recruitment my sophomore year of college. Now where I am today, I couldn’t imagine my college career without those so-called “strangers." And I’m not just talking about my sisters; I’m talking about all of the friends in all of the chapters that I had the honor of meeting and getting to know during recruitment.
After just one week, I had gained an entirely new, extraordinary network of women who I actually had a chance to talk with face-to-face, without phones as a distraction, and without even having to do a group project with them in class. That in itself is amazing.
Recruitment went so fast. I didn’t know much (or at all) about Greek letters let alone which letters matched which sorority; I didn’t have the perfect Kylie lipstick to match every outfit nor did I have the best schedule to allow for hours of time to get ready beforehand - and none of that mattered. Did I know that then? No way. I expected to be bounced around from place to place, rushing to go where I was supposed to be, not knowing what to talk about or what was coming next. What I found was understanding, humor and comfort in the fact that they, much like me, were nervous and felt the same issues on their end.
If you think joining a sorority means "being initiated" by singing Céline Dion songs as you clean and initiated members throw bologna at you, well, there you go with the movie ideas again. Rest easy, it just doesn't work like that. That happens in the movie "Syndey White," but not at Baldwin Wallace. So, you're good with that, too. Like I said, it;s not like the movies. Hazing doesn't exist - that's for certain. I will say this over and over again until people start to understand it: At Baldwin Wallace University, hazing doesn't happen.
I didn’t really know anything but what it felt from the outside looking in though. Everyone had amazing pictures and stories and events to talk about, and they seemed to be extremely personable. Did they really feel the same stress of trying to handle homework for the week and attending night classes while also making time to look presentable enough for recruitment events? Or did that just happen naturally for them? Let it be known that I worried, maybe even a little too much, but I made it. I found my place in Alpha Phi, and I’ll forever be grateful.
We're silly, we're loud and we're all in this together. OK, I see what you're saying, it's kind of like the movies because it sounds a little like High School Musical. I promise it's much more deep than that. Not to say that HSM isn't deep, but I digress...
During recruitment as a potential new member (PNM), I was talking one-on-one with women whom I had never met before in amazingly and intricately decorated rooms about my experiences and how they were in my shoes once, too. That was a fact. They all went through recruitment before, and they knew and understood my worries better than anyone else could. At one time they had friends who didn’t think recruitment was worth it, and they had people telling them that sororities were, “just social clubs with dues to pay.” They did it anyway. They went through recruitment with no regrets and found what everyone in college is trying to find – a place to feel like home’s not so far away; they found a home away from home.
Since that scary time of uncertainty and anxiety as a PNM, I have found amazing sisters who also take heart in supporting the Alpha Phi Foundation while also encouraging me as I set goals to reach my own dreams. They are women who I choose to work and hang out with even outside of our college campus. I’ve since realized that behind the doors of recruitment, it’s a mess; it’s disguised with pretty table cloths and wall decorations, but it’s a mess. Everyone is sweaty, worrying about how their breath smells and trying to cover their blisters with unnoticeable Band-Aids before they slip back into their shoes and open the doors to PNMs. No matter which side of the door you’re on, everyone is doing it, and everyone wants to make "their mess" look the best it can. Realizing this makes for a great icebreaker as you walk into a room. Laugh about sweat stains, disregard your inner shyness, and stand confidently in the shoes that are hurting your feet. Be honest, and be yourself. That’s what recruitment is all about!
In terms of balancing a life while “going Greek,” it is important to remember that we all have busy schedules, and we all make it work. Meaning, we will help you to make it work for you, too. In Alpha Phi, we have members who are athletes, are dedicated to the conservatory, have paid internships and jobs, and who are actively involved on so many different councils and clubs on campus while still holding positions within Alpha Phi, as well. Did I mention we also have the highest campus GPA? That means, yes, we make time for school work, too. And no, we don’t all look alike – remember this is not a movie. We are real women with real struggles, and we have an enormous support system who gives us the confidence and resources to get through anything life hands us.
From going through the process and trying something new like talking with “strangers,” recruitment gathers some of the most successful women on campus together for a few, quick days to grow the Greek life community and make you feel at home.
It seems like a stretch to ask hundreds of college people to put away their phones and look presentable way too early in the morning, but the benefits of doing this are endless. Women who are engaged in real conversation to find out more about other women in order to bring even more success to campus is a blessing - disguised by ribbons and glitter, of course.
I now have an entire network of people who have so much in common with me – from classes to hobbies to common friends – who I may not have gotten the chance to ever meet without giving recruitment a chance. I have met with women in every chapter in different capacities, regarding different things, all because we had the pleasure of meeting each other during recruitment. I can wholeheartedly say that I have friends in every chapter on campus because of recruitment, and you will, too!
Being in Alpha Phi doesn’t define me; I am still an individual with my own goals and opinions, but Alpha Phi allows me to be that independent person while still giving back to my community and reaping the benefits of working so hard to better our sisterhood. I’ve found loyalty and friendship within my sisters that I would have never found had I not gotten dressed up and walked into the seemingly chaotic weekend we all lovingly call, “recruitment.” You can, too. It’s your time to sign up for recruitment, and make the best of it. College goes by way too quickly to pass up amazing opportunities to grow as a person and make new friends.
