These last couple of years of my life have been surprisingly hectic, dare I say they have been chaotic. Now I know what you are all probably thinking, what does a 19-year-old college freshman born and raised in a semi-thriving neighborhood of Hollywood, CA know about the hardships of life? Well, I can tell you that despite judgement, I have learned more than a thing or two about pushing past heart-wrenching difficulties, and reinventing myself every chance I get. One of the more underrated, but versatile ideas that I have chosen to adopt is that of taking steps to learn to love yourself.
It is difficult for me to even recall how many times I have heard this phrase, upon hearing it I usually follow up with a polite smile and a very confused, “But what do you mean? I think I love myself pretty well.” As I reflect back to those moments, I do not think that I was fully ready to want to embrace who I was at the time. So many individuals spend their time worrying about making money to provide for their families, passing classes, relationships, cars, and another boat load of items that in reality are unable to cause full satisfaction for them if they do not find love within themselves. I am referring to your subconscious sitting in it’s lounge chair in the back of your mind whispering that neither you nor that item you just spent your money on are enough to make those around you happy. Not to mention, that same voice's insistence on making you feel like crap when you have made a mistake. It is almost as if we are our own worst enemies, and if this is in fact true can’t we in turn strive to be our own greatest heros?
Nobody is born perfect, and that is why I have concluded that the act of loving yourself is a process not a birth trait. It is one of those things you unfortunately learn the hard way, but that is OK because the reward is literally life changing. Loving yourself is important because it affects the dynamic of your life and the lives of those around you, even if you do not think so. You never know who is watching, and taking lessons from you or reacting to situations according to your own reaction.
I am aware that the process is not easy by any means, so here, in no particular order, are three things to remember throughout all of this.
1. Talk to the people you trust most
Often times when going through difficult situations, we tend to become turned off to social interaction, but talking is the best outlet for releasing feelings. I am sure that there is at least one person who you can turn and talk to when you feel down. Do not think that you are in anyway a bother to that person, they will more than likely gladly be there for you.
2. Accept who you are at the moment
In order to figure out what type of person you want to be, it is crucial to figure out who you do not want to be. You can do that be evaluating yourself in a positive manner. We all have certain characteristics that may be problematic in our lives. Do you know what your's are?
Remember that it is OK to not love certain aspects of who you are, it does not mean you hate yourself or that you are a bad person. It just means that there is room for improvement if that is what you are looking for.
