Sometimes in life, people feel like they have nowhere to go and no one to talk to. Whether someone keeps falling for the wrong person or they literally have nowhere to go, we often find ourselves stuck in a rut of confusion and hopelessness. However, there is always that one special person in your life that you feel like you can talk to about anything.
You always feel like you can go to them when you're feeling down and out, and they'll welcome you with open arms. While these people are more than willing to be there for you, the fact is you must meet them all the way. How will they know that you need them if you don't reach out to them?
If you read one of my previous articles on low self-esteem, you would understand that sometimes it can be intimidating for people to summon the courage to talk to people. This article is a follow up to that one, if you will. We must ask ourselves questions about who the right person is, and who the wrong person is.
It's very simple to tell who the wrong person is. Does the person you talk to understand what you go through or what you're saying? Do they absorb your content when you're talking to them? Do they express their emotions to you when you are talking to them? Do they even give you a hug goodbye and tell you "Just shoot me a text if you ever want to chat?" If the answer to any of those questions is "no," then you are confiding in the wrong person.
You would have to be a fool think that they don't understand you because they don't go through what you go through. It's because they pity you and are there to talk to you just to get you to stop complaining. They don't care about your feelings or what you have to say. As long as they make themselves look good or feel better about themselves, that's all they care about.
So, how do you know you're putting your chips in the right person? That's easy to figure out as well. These are the people that always start the conversations with you more than you do to them. That is a clear sign that they are interested in you and want to touch base with you. These people also always make you feel welcome when you talk to them as well. What do I mean by that?
Well, when you are in a conversation with someone, would you like them to say "Hi! How are you doing? Let's sit down and talk. What's on your mind?" or "Hey." *you tell them something's troubling you* "Oh. Damn, that sucks." Not too hard to figure out, right?
Finally, the most important and most obvious way to point out that the person you confide in is the right person: their relationship with you. I'm not talking about the person you date all the time, but someone you are very close to. Do you feel like just another acquaintance to them or do you feel that person is your brother or sister?
When you have a close and tight bond with someone, they are able to relate to almost anything you tell them. Why might that be? Probably because they have gone through what you have and felt what you have felt. It could also be because they are older than you and have more life experience. To me, that is even better because that is where the best advice comes from.
If you have ever heard a conversation that started something like "Well, when I was your age…" and just rolled your eyes in annoyance at it, well then I'm afraid you missed on a golden opportunity. Those stories are more than just reminiscing on a memory from long ago, they tell you those stories for a reason: to help you understand what your problem is and how you can overcome it.
By reading this article, I hope you now understand that there is someone out there that you can trust enough to talk to about your problems. Whether it's an older cousin or a roommate, talking to people is one of the most therapeutic things someone can do when they are dealing with issues; it's just a matter of finding the right person.
Some people aren't loyal to you at all. They are loyal to their need of you and once their needs change, so does their loyalty. You don't need those kinds of people in your life. Don't make the same mistakes over and over again and treasure every moment you spend with the people that you are close to.
