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Confessions of A Newly Found Vegan

No, we don't eat grass

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Confessions of  A Newly Found Vegan
paleoplan.com

I'll be the first one to say it: I never thought I'd become vegan.

Emphasis on the never.

Sure, I wanted to join the 'fit group". I always wanted to identify as someone who led a healthy, balanced lifestyle but just like my visits to the gym, it would never last and my devotion to bacon and beef pho ran deep. Too deep, real deep.

Earlier this year I made friends with someone who had very recently converted to the vegan lifestyle. Contrary to popular reaction, I didn't think she was crazy, or on some form of extreme diet. I actually admired her very much for her commitment to this decision. I noticed how happy and passionate she was on the subject, that intrigued me and after just a short time, my inquisitive nature took full effect.

I decided that I would start to research veganism for myself and as I am sure is obvious by my title, after very little but strongly supported research, I too converted (it should be noted, becoming vegan was never my intention but that's just how it panned out).

However, had I known the sarcastic comments, the eye rolls and judgmental stares I'd get at the supermarket while grocery shopping, the endless "vegan" memes or preaching I'd get from carnivores on social media or even worse: in public... I would have saved the "vegan" title for a much later date.

Let me say that everyone's harsh criticism has the been the worst and only bad thing about this decision. With that being said, let me get to the point: there are a plethora of misconceptions when it comes to veganism, and as a former meat fanatic, I get it. The word itself is scary. Depending on what your definition of "scary" is.

Enough babbling though, time to shed light on what seems to be, a HIGHLY offensive topic.


1. We don't just eat vegetables aka "Grass"


I know this is what most people want or do believe.

"I could never be a vegan."

"I hate salads."

"What does grass taste like?"

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA very funny, guys. I've never heard that one before. So creative


2. We're not always hungry

Admittedly, the first couple weeks of my turning vegan were difficult but down the road, your body will thank you AND it wont be begging for food every five seconds.



3. We can eat a lot of things, we just choose not to eat ALL THE THINGS


Even when you explain this a million times to "meat eaters/ non-vegans" they always seem to apologize: "you're vegan? I'm so sorry!"

No, sir/mam/person/thing: I'M sorry you don't understand. It's simple, we don't eat anything that comes from animals, WE'RE NOT DYING


4. Some of us are vegan for the environment and some of us do it for... well, just us.

There's the ethical, environmental and health aspect of becoming vegan. let me sum it up:

Some walk around like this

And then there's this:

I first became vegan for the latter, every other reason followed suit.


5. We're not miserable. If we were, we wouldn't be vegan


Our lives don't look like this... no matter how bad meat eaters want it to look like this

6. We hate having to apologize for not eating meat

We don't ask meat eaters to apologize for eating meat. so don't twist our arm trying to make us apologize for being vegan. What are we supposed to say? "I'm sorry my plants and legumes offend you???" Huh?

7. We don't think we're better

I really used this photo for the irony. IT'S NOT A COMPETITION.


8. We don't broadcast it 24/7

If you ask, we'll tell but other than that, we're not updating our status every five seconds or telling the grocery clerk that we're vegan. We know you don't care, ok?


9. You can be a vegan on a budget

This is just "vegan on a budget 101" it gets better with time. I promise. there is also the gift of take out. for example, Chipotle, Thai food, Indian food, Chinese food, burger joints. the list really is endless

10. WE EAT PROTEIN TOO!!!!

Two words: get smart

11. BYE BYE CONSTIPATION!!!!


This is my favorite. One of the many reasons I am so glad I chose to become vegan. I had a really bad time with this. I took laxatives galore, I changed my diet a million times, had regular doctors visits... in fact, during one visit, my doctor told me: "you're full of sh*t. no literally Keila, you're full of it, this is insane". Going vegan was the only thing that really made a difference and actually stuck. NO SHAME IN MY CONSTIPATION-FREE GAME!!! BYE BYE CONSTIPATION, YOU WERE LITERALLY THE WORST!!

On a much lighter and final note:

12. It's not gross. It's delicious


So, in the words of Queen Antoinette: let them eat cake. or steak. or plants. or whatever. just let them be!!

*quote has been modified for vegan usage*


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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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