We live in a world where a positive body image is sought out and encouraged. A world in which we are supposed to feel empowered in our own skin because everyone tells us it’s okay to be different and unique. A world in which pop culture icons tell us that being “thick” or having “dat a**” is desired. But if we are being honest, in the real world, being “thick” is sometimes not all it is cracked up to be. This world can be kind of hypocritical and contradictory. Now, I agree that every person should learn to accept their bodies, but sometimes, you deserve to vent.
ATTENTION: This is not an article to body shame women who are not curvy, every woman is indeed beautiful. However, there are some struggles that only my curvier ladies will understand.
Clothing
Let us first discuss the outrageous “One Size Fits All.” So many angry thoughts coil in my brain as I remember a time in which I went to a boutique with my two friends. We spotted a trendy, crocheted, Boho bralette with the tag reading “OSFA.” One size fits all, they told me? HA. Yeah, in what world did they think that this wasn’t flawed? As it fit my two friends perfectly, I couldn’t even come out of the dressing room, because I was so embarrassed due to the lack of coverage.
Ladies, how many times have you grabbed a clothing item with this label, only to find that it is completely too tight? Like rompers, for instance. They do not make rompers that will properly hang on our body types. Sure, they cover The Girls, but they then are far too snug on the thighs and butt.
Oh, let us not forget about our thighs and the fast growing epidemic of holes in our leggings. (RIP to all the leggings thrown away). You know that whenever you buy a pair of leggings, or pants at all, for that matter, that you are going to be back at it in a month or two. The oh so unfortunate lack of a thigh gap (the space in between the thighs that for some reason is in incredibly high demand) causes friction in the fabric and creates holes.
Oh my gosh, The Girls. Strapless garments are completely out of the question. Going without a bra? Only at night. Let’s not forget cleavage; unintentional cleavage all day, every day. Everything you wear ends up looking a little too... well... exposed. Let’s not even mention bathing suits…
Eating
As women, we are hormonal. Yes, we crave sweets and we crave wine and we crave naps. But also, as curvy women, we feel self-conscious about binging. It’s one thing if a tiny girl eats a lot and has those french fries on the side, because for her, well, she’s just a cute girl with a hardy appetite. For us? We are women who don’t know how to eat right or take care of our bodies. We constantly pick at our shirts when we eat out, afraid of what our stomachs look like. I don’t know what is more sad, the fact that we live in such a judgmental society or the fact that we are afraid to indulge because we are worried what people will think.
Males
The most frustrating of all. Guys. Guys say that they want a girl who has meat on her bones. A girl with a booty and a girl that has curves. Okay! Sweet, awesome. What do they do when they find her? They go for the skinnier girl.
This is not every guy, but to us, it seems like finding someone who will find us beautiful is nearly impossible. How will we find a man who can handle all of who we are, plus a little stretch mark on the side? Guys think that a thick woman means a Kylie Jenner or a Nicki Minaj. Some completely unrealistic expectation of what it's like to not be really skinny. Being thick or curvy means that, yes, there are stretch marks. Yes, every human being has rolls. Yes, there's cellulite. Take us as we are, because newsflash! No one is perfect. If you say you want someone curvy, expect a real human being.
Here’s the deal. It is always an emotional battle for a woman, dealing with her body image and her weight. We will always feel self-conscious in those crop tops and booty shorts. We might, at times, feel like the ugly friend because we aren’t getting male attention. But you know what? Being curvy, or having a little more weight to you, certainly does not make you ugly. I know it is frustrating and it rips at your self-confidence, but you truly have to see yourself for who you really are. Someone amazing and fun and bubbly. You will learn to enjoy yourself once you realize that confidence is key. Yes, it is a struggle to be curvy, and yes, you might not ever be a size 2, but who says a size 14 can’t be just as sexy? There is a man out there looking for you. And he’s waiting with Ben & Jerry’s and a lifetime supply of leggings.
