So recently I came to this huge realization about myself: I am a people pleaser. I have been a people pleaser for literally my entire life and I just now realized this about myself... What can I say, I'm a human and I have blinders for myself.
I know, it's not really a secret or anything super fascinating but it's something that has taken me time to process.
It is extremely hard work trying to please everyone else rather than pleasing yourself first. It honestly can suck most of the time but it's not the worst thing ever. I feel like the term people pleaser has a negative ring to it, but that's not necessarily how I see it. By being a people pleaser I've actually learned a lot more than being someone who's only out for my own wellbeing and benefit.
I have learned to be extremely conscious of other peoples feelings and this actually has helped me a lot with friendships and work as well. It's hard to put yourself in other people's shoes but when all you do it worry about others, it's not hard at all to catch when someone is unhappy or needs someone.
Being the way I am, I can't help but always say sorry even when I know I'm not in the wrong. I promise you though, I always mean it when I say sorry. It's always a genuine apology and concern for others that I can't help but have. Even if I just accidentally hit someone in the hallway you best believe I'm going to go out of my way to say "I'm so sorry. Are you okay?"
Now being a people pleaser doesn't mean I'm 100% always kind and considerate of others needs. If someone or something goes against my beliefs or is rude to me, I have no problem going against my instinct to "kill them with kindness."
While there are a lot of benefits to being a people pleaser, I will admit that there's a lot of negative parts about it as well. For example, I have noticed that I do somewhat start acting like the people around me. It's a terrible trait that I personally need to kick in the butt, but it's something that I have constantly noticed in myself. If you like dressing like a flower crown child and listening to Fleetwood Mac, odds are I will be wanting to do the same thing too. It's honestly something I've done without even realizing it and there are other people that are exactly the same way.
This is something that I have dealt with for practically my entire life and while it isn't my favorite trait about myself, it's something I'm working on fixing. It has always been hard for me to deal with people not liking me but in the real world, not everyone is going to be your friend and not all personalities mesh well together. While it's an easy concept to understand, it's way harder for people who want and need for others to like them.
So keep in mind guys that being a people pleaser isn't the worst thing ever and it's hard to try and please everyone so don't be mean to people like me. We're pretty fragile with our emotions.
