I'm a military sweetheart. I'm the girl with teary eyes left alone in the terminal you pass by in the airport. I'm the girl that you always see giggling on the phone in our dorm study lounge. There are so many people like me all over the country. We may have not signed our names on those contracts, but at that moment our hearts enlisted in the military. We are the real people outside of "Dear John" and "An Officer And A Gentleman." There's more to us than you may think.
The little things really do mean the most to us.
Those good morning texts, surprise flowers, and simple expressions of affection really do make our day. We know what it's like to go days and even months without communication. After that, it's easy to appreciate every moment you can get. And when we hear the phrase, "I got RA," our hearts flip with joy. We'd kill for a weekend getaway (or even simply a day) with our hero.
"I know how you feel, I'm dating someone at a different school" drives us bonkers.
Of course, you understand the distance aspect and the obstacles that come with it, however there's a certain intensity of a military relationship that just isn't comparable. While you've had arguments about which parties he went to on Friday night, we've had arguments about which position in the infantry will be least likely to put him in a deadly situation within a combat zone.
Comforting us is simpler than you think.
The efforts of comfort and empathy are duly noted, but more often than not, we don't want to hear, "At least he isn't deployed, right?" or "It'll be OK, you'll see him soon." All we need is a sturdy shoulder to cry on, and open ears to listen. We don't expect you to know exactly what to say to make everything better, because there isn't anything you can say. Sometimes actions truly speak louder than words.
We are faithful.
The common stereotype of the military girlfriend/wife running off into the sunset with another man isn't even an option to most of us. Sure, there are bad eggs that crack under the pressure, but the majority of us grow stronger every day and remain devoted to our best friend, no matter the distance or time that parts us.
"Already There" really does make us ugly cry (EVERY TIME).
I can't explain to you why on earth I put this heart-wrenching song in my Spotify playlist (the "Messages From Home" version, too). As soon as I hear the devastating tune begin to play, I'm a goner. It's common for me to call my mom sobbing like a baby for the third time in a week.
It's not acceptable to romanticize military relationships.
My man looks so fine in his dress blues, and I love daydreaming over our movie-worthy reunions but military relationships aren't fairytales. Saying "I love men in uniform" is like saying "I love feeling lonely, being sexually deprived, and worrying about my best friend as he is in another country." It's not something to aspire for and seek out. So please, enjoy your civilian relationships and appreciate how you can go see him practically any time you desire.
When it comes to FaceTime dates, we get creative.
Ever heard of a FaceTime movie night? Break out those laptops and Netflix accounts! These are the moments that brighten us up like the sun on a hot summer day. It's actually pretty fun to come up with new ideas for video chats, like a new challenge to spice things up.
We're proud as hell.
You bet we'll work our hearts out on those homecoming signs we've searched for on Pinterest for the past month, work two jobs all summer long to raise up the money for that plane ticket out to Twentynine Palms, and send the cutest care packages you've ever seen. We support our heroes and we do it better than anyone. With all the stress, loneliness, and overwhelming worry we feel on a weekly and even daily basis, there's always ten times the love.
