One of the things I think about often is how to make sense of God's relationship with Israel. (I know, you're totally intrigued after reading that sentence. I think it gets better.)
I'm not a Bible scholar. I'm sure scholars have many answers as to why super weird laws were mandated and why God spoke directly to Israelites but not to us. I honestly get really discouraged by the notion that I have to be extremely cultured and have a Ph. D. in Old Testament before I can fully accept the Bible. This pressure has come from outside the church and from within. It may be a great way to get some answers, but it isn't entirely practical. I don't want to be a Bible scholar. And I can't know everything about the ancient Jewish culture. I’m a biologist. I don't think God requires me to be a Bible scholar either. I kind of think he wants me to be a biologist.
This is why I have faith that I can find some answers pursuing my dreams as a scientist, physician assistant and average Bible-reader. And because I have found some answers this way.
Something I have found helpful (and equally confusing) is taking Israeli/Jewish culture into context when reading the Bible. It has really added depth and beautiful meaning behind things in the scriptures that have totally blown my mind. Although not a perfect example, something I learned about Psalm 22 comes to mind.
A friend of mine, whose knowledge and pursuit of the Lord I admire, told me that a custom among Jewish Rabbis was to quote the first couple of lines of a psalm or important passage from scripture to remind the people of the words or to drive home a point. Because Jews knew and memorized so much of the Torah, it was generally assumed they would remember the rest of the passage. He told me that when Jesus cries out on the cross, "My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?," he was doing just that. The Jews present at Jesus' crucifixion would have immediately recognized those words, and the remaining lines of Psalm 22 would have rang in their heads as a fulfilled prophecy of the pain of Jesus. I will never read the crucifixion of Jesus the same. And now every time I read some of Jesus' words that seem slightly out of place, I check my study Bible notes and Google his words to see what people are saying about them.
It's an important realization the American Chloe can easily miss the inherent cultural value behind much of the Christian narrative. But it still doesn't answer everything. Especially some really hard questions. And that's when life itself, and mere truth about my nature as a human, can dump answers in my lap. Not all of the answers, but some really good ones.
Why did the Israelites have so many stipulations from God regarding their dress and way of life? They are told to wear Tefillin, binding the law of the Lord to their arm and forehead. They are told not to cut the hair on the sides of their head and not to get tattoos. All of these things were commanded of them to remind them that they are God's people. It set them apart. Reminders of their covenant with God were intertwined into everything they did.
Man, oh man, does God know us better than we do. It doesn't take long as a Christian to realize how easy it is to slip into a stagnant relationship/covenant with God. I try my best to make it easier and to stay on track. So what do I do to make it easier? To put the thought at the forefront of my mind?
I thought about all the things I've implemented in my life that serve as important reminders for me. I have a wedding ring on my finger. It reminds me of the love and companionship I have in Tommy. It's a reminder for him too. I have a second ear piercing in both ears that I got my senior year of high school. It reminds me of my pledge to missions after a life-changing mission trip to Dominican Republic. Though I don't wear earrings in them anymore, I see them every time I put earrings in for the day. Tommy wears one of my hair ties on his wrist. It serves as his personal reminder of me throughout the day. Every morning I drink a cup of coffee. I do it because I enjoy it, and it's my own personal reminder to slow down and take a minute to enjoy the coming day. In the middle of the morning, my Bible app sends me a notification of the "verse of the day": a practical reminder for a Christian. These are very basic, but people have gone to bigger measures to put reminders in their life. For me, some of the more humbling reminders are the powerful stories behind tattoos. Because of some of the reasons people have told me that they acquire tattoos, I don't see them as frivolous and ridiculous like I used to. Some people have genuine, convicting reasons behind their tattoos that I think justifies them (regardless of how they will look in thirty years). Taking measures, even drastic ones, to remind yourself of something is not as uncommon as you think. It's pretty human, actually. Consider living your life practicing justice and grace as a constant reminder of a terrible injustice you committed in your past and your opportunity for a second chance. (What is a Christian life anyway but living for Jesus who died with your sin?)
God didn't mandate any material things of me when I became a Christian. But here I've gone and put all of these things in my life that serve the same purposes of the Jewish law. And I did it voluntarily! I'm sure a first-century Jew would read all of my reminders as silly, or as something he just doesn't fully understand. But that's OK. He has his reminders and I have mine. We aren't so different after all.
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1. You only ask things once.
Asking to go to your friends house a second time is futile. In fact, it may make things worse.
2. Seriously, you only ask once.
You don’t get to go out Friday and Saturday, silly child. Choose one.
3. When you do muster up the courage to ask your parents for something, you creep around and wait until they’re in a good mood.
This significantly improves your chances of getting a yes. Pro tip: Doing extra chores helps.
4. Before you get that final yes, you have to go through an interview.
Who are you going with? What time? Where are you going? Who else is going? Who are their parents? Where do they work? How long have they been there?
5. If you ever got “the eye,” you knew you were screwed.
Prepare yourself for a lecture when you get home.
6. You were always the first to leave your group of friends when hanging out.
If you ever want to be able to go out again, you better go home on time.
7. If you say you will be home at a certain time, you better be home at that time.
Calls start coming the minute you’re late.
8. Seeing a missed call from your parents sends fear and horror through your veins.
R.I.P. if you see two or more missed calls.
9. If relatives are coming over to the house, your room better be clean.
Because the one room they will not go in determines the cleanliness of the rest of the house.
10. You are careful about what jokes you share with your parents.
Anything remotely inappropriate results in a 10 second joke turning into a 30 minute lecture.
11. "You’re not an adult until you turn 18! You can do whatever you want then!"
Disclaimer: When you turn 18, it becomes, “My roof, my rules.”
12. If plans change while you’re out, you better text or call.
Don't be that kid that gets caught by their parents driving somewhere they weren't supposed to be.
13. Don’t talk back. Ever.
I don’t care if you were told to hunt down the last unicorn in the world using a pot of gold stolen from the leprechaun at the end of a rainbow. Just do it.
14. When you’re called by your full name, you’re in deep trouble.
Say your prayers.
15. Don’t make them call your name twice.
The second you hear your name being called, drop everything you’re doing and run.
16. Sleepovers are not a thing.
They just aren’t. Why sleep somewhere else when you have a bed at home?
17. Despite all of these things, you know your parents love you.
They might not always show it, but they do.
1. Pets
Getting a pet is great -- cats, dogs, fish, or any sort of thing you can keep makes you care for something beyond yourself and gives you company. (Some are huggable, too!) As a pet owner, you can definitely tell when they’ve gotten into trouble … and sometimes you get a little weird with them. Non-pet owners just wouldn’t understand.
2. Mornings
Without parents to wake you up, how do you even? Or, you know, if you fall asleep at your desk studying because you're working hard. Rough life, man. And mornings were hard enough as it was.
3. Mistakes
We all make mistakes, Ross. It's fine. Whether you mixed your colored laundry with your whites, or you were cleaning and you bleached something that was not meant to be bleached, there's gonna be nobody at fault but you. And even if you're by yourself (or your cat is judging you), you have to own up to it, and move on.
4. Cooking for yourself
Nobody can do sarcasm like Phoebe. Cooking is very exciting in the beginning and all, but once you're at that stage in your life when you're too lazy to even make ramen, and all you have in your fridge is an empty milk carton and some leftovers from last week, well, it's a lot less fun.
5. Hosting
You've finally got a place where your friends can hang and people can come over! But see above. Cooking, cleaning, all that stuff you need to do to prepare for guests is harder than it seems, and if you keep telling yourself that pizza isn't a cop-out, then everything will work out.
6. Taking care of yourself
Just like Chandler, you might not be entirely aware of what health and sanitation is. It's fine, we've all been there. And it's a lot harder than it seems. You're not alone.
7. Holidays
Since you can go all out, you will, and there's nothing your roommates can do about it. Friendsgiving? Heck yeah! St. Patty's Day? Of course! And best of all, Halloween, where your space becomes the spookiest around (on a budget, of course, nobody's made of money).
8. Roommates
So maybe you don't live exactly alone. It's good to have a roommate, right? Especially if they're a good roommate, so you don't have to be picking up after them or complaining to your cat. And when you want to have a do-nothing day, they'll be there for you (and you'll be there for them too.)
9. Keeping focused and getting stuff done
Don't even pretend. That's hilarious. If you can study, good for you, but the rest of us will be over here not doing what we should and hanging out with our friends instead. And cramming and panicking later.
10. Cleaning
If you've ever cleaned a place after a party, you are a survivor, a true warrior. Even cleaning bathrooms or the nooks and crannies of your place before a parent visits will yield some interesting results, however. You never know what you'll find, but it's usually not pleasant.
11. Social life
There's only two modes here: #foreveralone or everything's coming up roses. Without supervision or even any sort of restriction, you can do what you want to when you want to. That means going out ... or staying in. You can do whatever.
I digress.
Point being, family is always there – on the good days, the bad days, and even the days that you forget to shower (thanks guys). They still remind you to tie your shoes before you leave the house, and they wake you up when your alarm goes off 6 times and you still haven’t gotten out of bed. They support you in the bad times, applaud you in the good times, and, of course, lovingly humiliate you in all the worst times.
Unless you’re my brother, who likes to strip down every ounce of pride and good character that I have left in my body after enduring a 15-week semester from hell.
Totally kidding. I love my brother. And my semester wasn’t actually personally gifted to me by Satan himself.
But that doesn’t negate the fact that during Thanksgiving break this year, he decided to tell me that I’m the family member with the “resting bitch face”.
“It’s not that bad,” he tried to tell me.
Thanks. Happy Thanksgiving.
What is it about the infamous “RBF” that makes some people just… have it? Why do I have one, but my mom doesn’t? Why does the girl across the hall have one, but her roommate doesn’t? Why does the cashier at Dairy Queen have one, but everyone who gets ice cream from her doesn’t?
It’s talent. It has to be.
I guess I don’t disagree with my brother. But he’s definitely the first one to have ever pointed it out. If you’re anything like me (and your brother tried to soften the blow by telling you that Pout-Pout Fish was “your book”), then you might resonate with these 7 things whenever someone asks you, “Do you know what an “RBF” is?"
1. You’re tired of people asking you if you know what “RBF” stands for every time you zone out.
I already know where this is going.
2. You’re constantly using the excuse, “I’m just tired” when people ask you if you’re mad.
I mean, I’m not lying. I’m in college. “Tired” is just another thing that courses through my veins and keeps me alive – alongside caffeine, Netflix, and probably really cheap alcohol.
3. Or “I’m just thinking.”
Thinking about the next time I’m going to get food, probably. No really, I’m not mad. Just hungry.
4. In fact, you’re rarely ever actually mad.
My zone-out time is just really sacred, that’s all.
5. But when you are, people usually can’t tell.
This one’s really convenient for all of us passive-aggressive introverts out there who hate drawing attention to ourselves.
6. You find other people with RBF’s and have to convince yourself that you don’t look like them.
Or maybe I do. Actually I don’t know. I hope I don’t.
7. You constantly remind yourself, “At least I’m not a psycho.”
Having a RBF can’t possibly be worse than having a creepy smile every time you zone out, can it?
I’ve learned that the nice thing about suffering from RBF is that it means alone time when you need it. Can’t be that bad, right? I mean, if it makes anyone more comfortable, I could start eerily smiling and laughing quietly to myself every time I zone out. But somehow I don’t think that would make the situation any less awkward. So instead, I’m just going to embrace my RBF for now. And maybe go read Pout-Pout Fish. But if I start to seem angry while I’m reading it, I promise I’m not. I’m probably just really into it.
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