It's that time of the year again. School is back in session. Upperclassmen return to the grueling world of academia and bright eyed new students begin their foray into the newest chapter in their lives. For many, it is a time to reinvent yourself. Be more like the person you have always wanted to be without the pressures of the former reputation you had before. A time to truly come into your own and show the word who you really are. For some, that means taking one of the biggest steps in your life: Coming out. No matter how and when you do it, it is never easy. Personally, I didn't come out until 21 (even though it was obvious before then). It takes time. I'd like to offer a little advice on coming out that I'd wished I had back then.
1. Take your time. ![]()
Coming is difficult. That is a fact. It's not something you rush into because it does change your life in a pretty big way. Do it in your own time and on your own terms. Don't let pressure push you into something you might not be ready for. It may be "obvious," but it is still your life and your decision. Your reasons are your own.
2. Find a safe space.
Find a space that is safe and comfortable to express yourself. Most colleges (public at least) have an LGBT center on the campus. Go in and have a look. Talk to people. We don't bite (most of us). If you're not ready to do that, it's OK! Create your own. A safe space isn't always physical. Keep a journal or make a playlist. As long as you feel comfortable in your own skin when you are there.
3. Get to know the community.
Go check out some of the events that go on during the school year. I recommend a drag show. At ASU there are four a year hosted by SAGA (two amateur, two professional). They're fun, high energy and a very open and accepting space. They also have App State Pride in the spring. You don't have to go full blown pride parade (I've been out for six years now and have still never been to a big pride celebration). Find the events that are local to you and go check them out!
4. Find support and allies.
It's always great to have someone to talk to, especially when things get tough. Once again, your LGBT center or group is always a great option. But if you aren't sure or aren't comfortable, here are some other options:
The Trevor Project: (866) 488-7386
Have a Gay Day: (937) 476-1921
Equality House: (510) 590-2834
5. Learn some history.
June 28th, 1969
June 28th, 1970
June 5th, 1981
April 29th, 1996
June 26th, 2015
All of those dates are important.
6. Come out!
This may seem contradictory to my first piece of advice, but I promise it is just as important. We are a very loving and supportive community. Those of us who've gone through the coming out process (whether it be gay, bi, trans, GNC, etc.) are always willing to lend a hand, an ear, or even a shoulder. You are never alone. Come join the party!
