A new social content site has garnered a healthy amount of attention lately amongst pyramid-scheme-hungry college campuses across the nation. The website, Luminate Online, allows its founders to profit off of topical user-created posts (called "Sparks") filled to the brim with their own opinions. The platform offers to pay to each of its creators based on a 'rewards system', in which all content creators are promised a salary of $20 a post. Provided, of course, that the content is christened by an ordained priest and receives at least a 50% on Rotten Tomatoes.
"I don't mind the fact that I put hours of effort into writing my posts while the company grows and I receive no compensation. Pyramid schemes are actually kind of my thing," explained junior Hailey Falchuck. "As long as I can tell the world the top ten reasons I'm voting for Bernie Sanders in the next presidential election, I'm down for anything!" Her 2005 Hyundai Tucson sported six bumper stickers that further reiterated her motivation.
Whether the user believes they can solve race relation issues by pointing out the fact that the Pledge of Allegiance isn't written in iambic pentameter, or that dubstep wouldn't exist without the influence of feminism, one thing remains constant among all crew members aboard this ship -- they retain a bittersweet optimism for believing their posts will reach readers outside of their immediate friend group.
Luminate Online is outperforming all social media platforms of similar nature, and it's not difficult to see why. Luminate is essentially the same as all other major pyramid schemes popular amongst students but boasts a really cool name alongside a sleek, minimalistic, off-green candle sigil.
For those daring, young activists seeking to have their beliefs and standpoints to be widely unregarded while simultaneously making strangers substantial amounts of money, Luminate may just be the trendy scheme that you're looking for! You may also want to consider waiting for the next cool college kid scheme to ensnare you. Who knows? It could be just around the corner!
