"You mean you've never? Wow, I don't know how. I mean, at least just get a boyfriend so you know what you like or dislike."
Yes, folks. This is a conversation I have with the majority of people soon after I get acquainted with them. You know how it goes. Small talk with a person you just met normally consists of complaining about your high school/small town, asking them if they saw that hilarious Vine, and raving about the newest trending music. After all of the awkward "let's try to find something in common" talk, the subject of significant others soon arises. Girls currently in relationships pull up their Instagram to show off their beau's (sorry men, I'm clearly not well educated on how this scene plays out for males.) While, girls who are currently single say something along the lines of "Ugh, men. I'm really just enjoying being single right now. I need to find myself first." Then, there's me: the girl who's never had a boyfriend and has only "talked" to a few guys (non-millennials: if you're not sure what I mean by "talk," ask the nearest high school/college-aged student.)
My parents never directly told me that I could not have a boyfriend. However, they raised me in such a way that I thought "dating" before I had a license was pointless. If I was not old enough to drive, I was not old enough to date. Also, asking my mother to drive my date and I to the movies would be the ultimate insult towards my 15-year-old independence.
After I got my license, I still did not actively look for a boyfriend. Even as a high school student, I planned on dating with the intention of marriage. There is no point in dating someone if I cannot see a future with them. Every relationship ends in a breakup or a marriage. So, I spent my entire high school career single, while focusing on becoming the best version of myself.
The immature high school boys never impressed me, primarily because I've been 13 going on 30 since I was 4. No one lived up to the expectations that my father had set. Nor did they display the qualities that my mother told me I deserved. I soon realized that I was light years ahead of high school boys, all of the good guys were taken, and the other "date-able's" didn't want a girlfriend.
I was reassured by adults that I would quickly find a boyfriend in college. As a realist, I knew that such luck was unlikely for two reasons. First of all, I'm picky. Secondly, I didn't want the added stress of my first relationship on top of adjusting to college. My freshman year of college left just as quickly as it came, and here I am--the single sophomore that I was this time four years ago.
However, this is not a plea of desperation. I am unapologetically single. The time and circumstances have never been just right for a relationship to fall into my lap. That's perfectly fine with me. I'm content with my best friends and closest family members. Being boyfriendless has no effect on my life; the people that I love are sufficient enough for me. After all, how would I know that missing out on something if I've never had it?
