I read Sydney Lind Moore's "From The Girl Ready To Settle Down At 20," and I just have one question: you want to settle down because you would rather stay in than go out?
There is nothing wrong with wanting to settle down young and be with the person you love. That is a great life if you found the one that you want to be with forever, but you should have a better reason to settle down than that.
There is nothing wrong with wanting time to yourself whether that means going out partying and drinking or just sitting at home with a book.
I am a 22 year-old college senior that is so far away from wanting to settle down that the thought scares me. I have never been a party-er, I'm not much of a drinker, and I like to lay in bed more than anything else, but that doesn't mean that I want to settle down. I lived at home for 18 years and I have been in college for the last four, and even I haven't lived it up. I have never been on my own. I have no idea what it's like to not be in school or not to depend on someone.
It's scary to think that in just a few short months I will be on my own, my family will mentally support me, but it will be me that I have to depend on. As scary as that sounds, I could not be more excited. I can't wait to have a real job and to live in the apartment that I pay for myself. I could not be more excited to have this completely independent life. Moore is 20 and I am only two years older than her, so it's not like I'm super wise or anything, but I do know that I am a completely different person now than I was when I was 20. I had completely different dreams and wants, and in just two quick years I had a whole new plan. Moore based her reasoning on wanting to settle down by saying she doesn't like to go to parties and that she likes to go to bed at 9pm, but I am the same way, and I could not be further from wanting to settle down.
I want to experience places, people, things that I have never even thought of before. And you can do all this with your husband/wife obviously, but wouldn't it also be fun to do it on your own? To say that you did that. I think that's pretty grown up too, Moore. Growing up doesn't mean settling down.
Everyone is different, and there is nothing wrong with settling down, but there is nothing wrong with wanting to experience life alone before settling down. Don't think that because you like to hang out at home more than go out and get drunk that the solution is to settle down. There are better reasons to want to settle down, and it doesn't make you any less mature to want to be single.
