1. "How are your grades?"

Haven't looked at them in months...

2. "Are you dating anyone?"

No, and if I was I wouldn't tell you.

3. "Have you lost any weight? Are you working out?"

I'm just not eating..

4. "Have you been eating healthy/right?"

Wait Taco Bell isn't healthy?

5. "How is it like being home for the holidays?"

Great, until you started to ask me these questions.

6. "Do you miss being at college?"

I'm saying no, but I'm meaning yes.

7. "What are you planning on doing with your degree?"

Uhhhh.. hopefully use it.

8. "How are the roommates?"

I hope good. I haven't seen them in a couple of weeks.

9. "Wow, you must go out a lot, eh?"

Not often.....

10. "Are you sleeping well?"

Sleep is for the weak apparently.

11. "Do you have a job? How are you affording all of these new clothes and your food?"

I'm in the negatives in my bank account.

12. "Do you ever miss home?"

The free food, free rent, somewhere to do laundry? Yes.

13. "The job market is not doing well right now. Aren't you worried?"

*dies a little on the inside*