I was born in Kingston, Jamaica and moved to NYC when I was 4. I grew up under some pretty over-protective parents. For awhile, I wasn't doing so well in school and many other aspects of life. It's not uncommon for teenagers to hear of their parents disapproval as they casually, but sometimes unknowingly, compare them to other teenagers.
"You know, your cousin received (insert amazing achievement here) last week, right?"
"Your brother started his new job at (insert a job that makes parents proud here)."
What does this have to do with me? It's easy to act like those statements are just praising others but let's be honest here. Some parents say them to let their kids know they aren't up to their standards. There are ways to encourage someone without trying to slyly compare them to others, not by reminding your child that they aren't adequate at the moment.
Of course I love my parents and I'm grateful for all that they've done for me. They've fed me, clothed me and gave me opportunities that many others do not have. I'm healthy, and I've started college. But it's time to move on. It's time to move to a new stage in life where I don't have to be limited because I live under their roof. This seems to be a very prominent reason why a lot of high school seniors have "Far from home" as a requirement when choosing their colleges. It definitely was a requirement for me.
I'm now 19 and dorm for college. The amount of freedom I first experienced the I moved here was astounding. To me, once a child turns 18 and graduates from high school, they should be awarded a certain amount of respect from their parents. They shouldn't be seen as "children" anymore, but as an adult who happens to be a son or daughter. If not, then that would just makes me want to move out, sooner rather than later.
My mother, in particular, doesn't seem to understand that I'm an adult now. I no longer want to "feel like an adult" like those kids who try on their parents clothes.
So no Mom, I will not call you every day to have 3 hour conversations. I will not argue with you about things you refuse to not have control over.
I will call you every few days because I've got several assignments due and want to actually enjoy my time at college. I want to live my life freely and enjoy it as it passes by me.
I love them, and will always cherish my parents. But I need a certain amount of respect as an adult who is trying to better himself and create a livelihood for himself. First with a Bachelor's in Business and then with a masters in Computer Science.
