Being a college student can be stressful. If you're in college currently then you'll know that balancing classes, studying, work, relationships, sleep, and a social life can be both mentally and physically draining. For me (and probably most of us), add being broke 99.8% of the time and the fact that when there IS a rare moment of free time, you generally experience a strong urge to cry, curl up into the fetal position, and binge eat ice cream or pizza (sometimes both simultaneously). I've had family, as well as friends, who have fallen into some what of a funk these past few months, perhaps just burnt out, or challenged with their own internal struggles. In some cases with the weather transition from summer to fall we see mood and attitude changes... So if this applies to you, I'm going to share my own recent experience of the same kind of situation. Sometimes you just need a reminder to reevaluate the important things in your life, returning to your roots and ultimately remembering who you are.
It's so easy to lose track of yourself amid the whirlwind of the college lifestyle. I consider myself a fairly independent college student. Working a total of four jobs, full time class load, and, naturally, embracing the social scene when I can. It can take a heavy hit to realize that things need to change. Mine was experiencing a breakup of a two year off and on again relationship. While this in itself was difficult to grasp, the same week it seemed I was hit repeatedly with bad news. Several significant problems in my family arose, and with all of this I found myself sinking into a very deep depression, isolating myself from everyone and spending most of the time in bed wondering how I was going to handle all of this alone, especially when I was so accustomed to the support of my ex. If you find yourself in this situation, for whatever reason, it's important to realize that it's okay to feel weak. It's okay to be vulnerable. It's okay to lean on your friends- seek them out, they want to help you. A positive attitude, no matter what the situation, makes a world of difference. Everyone has a different story and struggles. In most cases, however, things could always be worse. Don't forget that.
I was having a conversation with a good friend recently, and what he said really made an impression on me. Basically, what is going to carry on with you in the long run? Is this going to impact you in five years? Think about how much time and energy is spent wasted on worrying about something that is merely a small chapter in your life. Think about what you want to happen in the long run, and work on yourself to ensure that you reach that goal. After thinking about the concept of these statements for awhile, something clicked.
If you are someone who loves very deeply and easily, an end to a relationship can seem like the worst pain in the world. After some time, I've found that it's actually the opposite. Sometimes it's just not the right person, not the right timing. You will find strength in yourself that you didn't know you had, and it will surprise you in the best of ways. I've been making changes that will, ultimately, help me in the long run.
As result of the reasoning which led up to the breakup, I have sworn off 'binge drinking' large amounts of liquor. I hope to never have a black-out experience again in my life. I've decided I will respect and understand his decision to end our relationship- even though this was at a time where I needed support and comfort the most. The hardest thing, initially, was wrapping my head around the fact that someone who I thought loved and cared about me could leave me so easily. However, I will take responsibility for my actions and use this as a learning experience for my future. Not just from the failed relationship- but coping with the entire week of bad news and negativity.
I tried really, really hard to love both as hard as I could, and give as much as I could to someone. It is very difficult to have all of the good I have tried to do and give disregarded because of the situation which happened in the end.
However, I'm still learning, every day, to be a better person, bigger person, to love harder, learn more, and to be happy. To stay positive even when I feel at my lowest. I am growing, we all are, remember that, and realize that no one is going to get through this stage of life without making mistakes. If someone really cares about you, even when things get rocky, you run toward each other, not away. I'm a big believer in if it's meant to be it will be. If someone is toxic for you, you will see, eventually, that bad things fall apart so better things can fall together.
Keep your chins up, ladies and gents.
