Nothing is better than a October breeze, under the LED stadium lights on a Saturday evening. Football is a religion in our household. If we are ever at home, the television is blaring referee whistle's and touchdowns cheers sporadically. The one thing that never makes its way to the camera, are the coaches wives. We typically sit away from the large crowd, somewhere we can stress out in peace as the game gets heated. Me, personally, I sit at the very top of the stadium on the 50 yard line. I am going on year three as a coach's lady; and have come to realize that it's just as much of a business for us, as it is our men. When the team loses, we hear it the whole way home (some games it's silent, which is worse). When practice doesn't quite go as planned, you best believe that we are already asleep by the time they come home. When the coach loses his job, we lose ours too (no more sweaty boys to take care of, your two week notice will have to be put in soon, packing up the house becomes priority). But from the outside looking in, we are just the coach's wife that always has a big smile on her face to greet all of the incoming fans. Behind that smile are many lonely nights waiting up for meetings to come to an end, tears due to the overload of stress on what's next, sleepless nights listening to film playing on your living room television. The camera will never capture those moments; it will only capture the celebrations of the winning team and the disappointed faces of the losing team.
When you see the coach's wife watching the game, she is more than likely up on her feet, biting her nails, or snacking on popcorn as she tries to make calls from the bleachers. She is clearly one of the few people in the stands that has a clue of what is actually happening. She may cuss, throw her popcorn down, or even pace back and forth. My best advice is to just say hello and give her a hug; don't ask about the season or even the current game because she is way too focused to answer honestly. What people don't realize about coaches wives is how independently strong they are. Six months out of the year they are the ones raising their children, cooking three meals, cleaning up the house, and going to sleep praying that a win comes that upcoming Saturday. We are basically by ourselves throughout football season; its challenging EVERY season. We learn to adjust to the hectic schedule. We go about our days like it's normal; when you try to explain it to someone it makes us sound completely insane. Their heads normally turn sideways and ask, "How do you do it?"
The answer is simple: We pray, stay patient, and make sure to have snacks for the players every Saturday. We become caregivers for the players. We invite them into our homes to love as our own, to make a home-cooked meal a few times each season, and most importantly, to support each and every young man that walks through our door. These players are the very few that see the hard work of a coach's wife. They know how challenging it is for us; but they also know that we do it selflessly. We choose this lifestyle because of the one that we love.
No, it is not easy by any means; but it is worth it. The wide smile that you see on your coach's face when his big play falls through. The bear hugs that are given when you win the rivalry game for Homecoming. The sweaty (and normally stinky) pictures that make it into the season scrapbook. The reminders and reassurance that is given when you feel weak right after he loses his job. The "vacations" you get to take while on recruiting visits. The prayers late at night, just asking for peace and guidance. There is nothing stronger than a coach's wife's relationship with Christ during football season. We are reminded that God is in control of everything. We eventually learn to stop worrying about what's next. We learn to adjust along the way and quickly.
One thing is guaranteed though; our love for our coach is never questioned.
So when you see a coach's wife, just hug her. She needs it, even if she is smiling. Behind that smile is so much more. Remind her that she is strong, selfless, and a servant of God. Let her know that she makes the team stronger (I promise, coach's wouldn't survive without their women). Lastly, if you believe in prayer, add her into yours.
P.S. Don't ask her for free tickets. She only gets a few for each game; they are more than likely going to family.
