With feminism on the rise, it seems that victims of sexual assault have found the strength to tell the world their story. As soon as they finally feel like they no longer have to suffer alone, they are scrutinized by society and the media.
In the '60s and '70s, women weren’t even educated on their own anatomy. They had no control over their lives or their bodies. They suffered from domestic rape and they suffered in silence. Through the Women’s March and the Civil Rights Movement, there was hope that there would finally be social, political, and economic equality for everyone.
How can we still face the same issues and more 40 years later? Why does the way a woman dresses define her?
What is considered appropriate to one person might not be to the next. So who gets to decide?
How can some people be so ignorant as to think that because a woman wears revealing clothing she wants to have sex with anyone?
News flash! NO ONE WANTS TO BE RAPED! CLOTHING DOES NOT DICTATE CONSENT!
What about the women and children sold into human trafficking? They weren’t showing any skin and now their lives are ruined. It seems to me that the common denominator here is not how women dress, it is that men still see women as property. Well, I would like to welcome everyone to 2018 where women are free.
Whether a woman goes out wearing a short skirt or sweatpants, she is not consenting to sex by what she wears. If a woman meets someone and they both verbally consent to sex then that is one thing. But no man should assume that a woman consents. Men should not take advantage of women that are intoxicated and blame them. More importantly, women should not assume that other women are dressing to have sex with someone.
I am a full blown feminist so I am very biased on the subject. But I asked people their opinions on whether or not clothing is consent and their thoughts on the Golden Globes. All the information I received was anonymous and I could see that most people felt the same way I did but had different reasons. Others had completely different opinions with little information to support their argument so I remain biased.
Some of the responses I received were:
“The way a woman dresses may indicate an expectation she has of potentially engaging in sexual activity during a night out/date etc. However, we cannot assume this and therefore cannot regard any style of dress as consent. If dressing scantily is a sign of consent, then surely a majority of women wearing bikinis on the beach are looking to get some action. Women, and men, should be able to dress how they want within the confines of the law (public indecency) and comfortably without having to wonder, does the way I am dressed signify any level of consent to sexual activity?”
“Women have the right to wear as they please. The only level of consent is yes or no. Women should be able to show what they want the same way a man does.”
“A woman can dress conservatively and desire sex equally as much as someone who dresses less 'conservatively' that desires sex.”
“A person shouldn't have to wear clothing that says ‘not down for sex with strangers’ (literally or figuratively) to avoid being raped. And lets be honest, that wouldn't stop a rapist anyways because they aren't looking for consensual partners, they're looking for power and gratification and sometimes even a challenge. Clothing won't protect you from that kind of person. Being smart, observant, and knowing how to protect yourself might and those things have nothing to do with your clothing.”
“Dress like a prostitute, get treated as one”.
Let’s be clear on one thing.
Women CAN dress however they want.
Women CAN dress to attract men or women if they choose to.
Women CAN be sexy.
But while some women dress for sex, NO ONE dresses to be raped.
When will men and women stop “slut shaming”?
Before you judge the way someone dresses, think about these few things. Your definition of modesty, or what is appropriate to wear, could be different than someone else’s and most likely is. You don’t have to judge anyone just because you disapprove of what they are wearing. If they were to ask your opinion, give it to them, but do not treat someone wrongly just because of what they are wearing. No matter what someone is wearing, no one deserves to be manhandled or disrespected.
If you respect people you will not dictate your level of respect based on what they are wearing.
I do not think that wearing revealing clothing while raising awareness for sexual assault is the best way to go about it. Just like telling people about Jesus while you are drunk or high could give someone the wrong idea. Nonetheless, women can show as much cleavage as they feel comfortable with. I mean in the end it brought attention to the “Time’s Up” movement. Now people should find ways to directly help everyone who is traumatized from sexual assault and put an end to this.
Why are women fighting against women instead of fighting for women? What does it take for women to finally be seen as equals? When will we stop shaming women for wanting to have sex? But most importantly, when will we stop talking about the way women dress and actually work to help women who have been sexually assaulted?