If you're anything like me - you can't stand the holidays. It just seems like an overrated reason to spend money on people you can't stand all year. The only thing worse than sending your bank account into the negative is those awful holiday tunes. So here's a playlist I've compiled over the years for people who can't stand Christmas music!
It's 2016 so I guess I have to put a trigger warning on this, some of these songs mention suicide so if that's not something you're into... please do not listen to these songs.
1. Yule Shoot Your Eye Out - Fall Out Boy
"One awkward silence and two hopes you cry yourself to sleep; staying up, waiting by the phone and all I want this year is for you to dedicate your last breath to me before you bury yourself alive"
This is a pop-punk classic and I can't name a person who doesn't like this song. It's a great song for anyone who is going through a break up around the holidays or just hates their ex and wants them to die this Christmas.
2. Merry Christmas, Kiss My Ass - All Time Low
"And I hope you're happy with yourself cause I'm not laughing. Don't ya think, it's kind of crappy what you did this holiday? When I gave you my heart you ripped it apart like the wrapping paper trash. So I wrote you a song, hope that you sing along and it goes: Merry Christmas, kiss my ass"
This is definitely another song you can dedicate to an ex if you're going through a break up this holiday season. The music video is hilarious and it's just an all around fun song.
3. Santa Stole My Girlfriend - The Maine
"Santa, you b!tch. Didn’t get a damn thing from my Christmas list; all I got was this broken heart and that’s it"
So I doubt this song is actually about Santa stealing this mans girlfriend BUT it is definitely a good song if you just found your best friend is sleeping with your significant other. This is definitely your Myspace era kind of music... so if you're feeling angsty for 2008, this is definitely the way to go. (You haven't forgotten "Into Your Arms" or "Everything I Ask For" have you? If you have... this band is still around is still making really sad jams so you should definitely still be listening.)
4. Alone This Holiday - The Used
"You throw the thought of us away, you'll be alone this holiday"
This song goes a different route from the previous songs on this playlist. This is the one you listen to in the bath-tub while chainsmoking cigarettes and drinking wine directly from the bottle. This has always been one of my favourites.
5. Don't Shoot Me Santa - The Killers
"Oh, Santa
It's been a real hard year
There just ain't no getting around this
Life is hard but look at me I turned out alright"
This is definitely one of the most confusing anti-Christmas songs I put on this playlist. I'm not sure if Santa's killing the dude or if this dude went around a killed people. Not sure. It's a good song though.
6. I Won't Be Home For Christmas- Blink 182
"It's Christmas time again. It's time to be nice to the people who you can't stand, all year;
I'm growing tired of this Christmas cheer"
A pop punk Christmas classic. If you don't know this song, get to know it. It's one of my personal favorites and by one of the best bands ever. If you disagree, you're wrong. There's no argument on this one.
7. I Hope You Have A Sh!tty Christmas - Landon Tewers
"sucks you're lonely now and everyone hates you, my new woman's fxcking sexy so thank you, you'll be okay I'm sure somebody will want you, but just for a night cus no one will love you"
I asked my friends in the Defend Pop Punk Group on Facebook what their favourite holiday songs were and this was one of the most liked ones... it's definitely bitter. And I absolutely love it. I'm hearing it for the first time as I write this and it's a good laugh and a great F U to any exes who you might want to die this Christmas.
8. Ex-Miss - New Found Glory
"This holiday is overrated. It turns out the way I expected. This holiday is one to forget. Another year, this time I'll regret; that I spent too much time and money on you"
Another pop-punk classic. An upbeat sad song like most of them are. It's a great song about how overrated this holiday is and how we need to stop spending money on people because that's not what this holiday is supposed to be about. Give what you can.
9. We've Got Diggin' Out To Do - You, Me, And Everyone We Know
"Because despite the way I feel tonight, though my tone takes a colder hue. There's no time for being blue; we've got diggin' out to do"
This is for sure one of the most positive songs on this playlist. Please remember to try your hardest to stay positive - even if things get you down this holiday season. The new year is around the corner and you don't even have to wait until then to start making changes!
10. Killing Myself For Christmas - Sick Puppies
[I'm trying to keep this playlist pg-13 but I couldn't NOT put this song on the playlist - I'm not going to add lyrics to this one because I don't want anyone to cry about it being offensive]
I feel like everyone has been able to relate to this at one point or another. Especially since finals are right before Christmas and everyone wants to kill themselves or are killing themselves due to exhaustion that comes with finals and the holidays in general.
11. eXmas - Drop The Girl
"Here's to a Christmas alone..."
Chances are you haven't heard of this one but it's definitely a GREAT anti-Christmas song. This is by a local band out of Virginia (friendly reminder to support your local scene).
https://www.dropthegirl.bandcamp.com
12. Forget December - Something Corporate
"On Christmas morning, outside was pouring
All was hopeless in this home"
So... if you've never cried to Something Corporate... are you even real?
13. 12 Days Of Christmas - Taking Back Sunday
There aren't any words to describe this song. It's the thoughts you have every time you hear the original version of the song... in the form of a song. Anyone that knows me that I couldn't make ANY type of playlist without including Taking Back Sunday.
14. This Christmas - Every Avenue
"This Christmas I'm worried to death
So bring me some good news
'Cause it's all I've got left"
This one of my absolute favorites to sing along to.
15. Christmas By The Phone - Good Charlotte
"Why did you leave me for Christmas? You left me lonely its true; could you have waited till New Years? At least the year would be through..."
As someone who gets dumped right before Christmas every single year (let's cross our fingers that I make it through this one), this is on repeat every single year. Everyone loves a little Good Charlotte right?
16. Unwritten Christmas - Sum 41 / Unwritten Law
None of these lyrics particularly stand out enough to quote here to convince you to listen but it's an excellent song. So definitely listen to it. Get out of bed, sleepy heads.
17. Merry Christmas, I Missed You So Much - Taking Back Sunday
"Merry Christmas, welcome home
I can't believe I made it, I'm so glad I came home"
This is definitely one of the better songs on this playlist. If you're coming home from college (or just coming home in general) for the holidays, this is the song for you. It reminds you that home is truly where your heart is. Always keep your loved ones in mind.
18. Punk Rawk Christmas - MxPx
This whole album is pure gold. Click the link, it's in a playlist. Enjoy. Thank me later.
19. Santa's Pissed - Motionless in White
The intro to this song is pure gold. This is definitely one of the heavier songs on this playlist, if not the heaviest.
20. X-M@$ - Corey Taylor
"If I ain't drunk then it ain't Christmas"
You know those annoying family members that you just want to choke but instead you just choke back a couple double shots of vodka and keep your mouth shut? This is the song that will play in your head every single time you lay eyes on them this Christmas.
21. Maybe This Christmas - For All Those Sleeping
"Maybe this Christmas, I'll get my wishlist and you'll be back into my arms again; but if this Christmas, you are still with him: I'll have to make another wish instead; I hope you both drop dead"
This is an extremely bitter song. While I can't relate to the bitterness anymore, I definitely relate to the fact that I want my ex to drop dead around Christmas.
22. Christmas at 22 - The Wonder Years
"We'll never spend the holidays alone. Proving once again that there's a reason my friends still tend to call this place home."
There's a lot of people out there bitter about being alone for the holidays but just remember - as long as you have your friends, pizza, and some stolen cable... you'll be fine. Smile. Be happy.
HONORABLE MENTIONS:
Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays - Issues
Last Christmas - Jimmy Eat World
December - Neck Deep
Decemberism - Man Overboard
Christmas Lights - Yellowcard
Deck The Halls - Zebrahead
All I Want For Christmas Is You - My Chemical Romance
All I Want For Christmas Is A Bag Of Weed - Common Enemy
Santa Claus Is Thumbing To Town - Relient K
Ho Ho Hopefully - The Maine
Mr. Grinch - VersaEmerge
Christmas With You - Artist VS. Poet
O Holy Night - Go Radio (This is beautiful)
X-Mas Has Been X-ed - NOFX
Little Drummer Boy - The Almost
Christmas In Hollywood - Hollywood Undead
FAIRYTALE OF NEW YORK - THE POGUES
I am absolutely sure that I have left a bunch out. Comment your favorites and any I might have forgotten! I hope this playlist gets you through the holidays!
