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50+ Most Funny Christmas Jokes for Kids and Adults

Funny Christmas jokes that are capable enough to rib-tickle the funny bone of the most stubborn guy in your family.

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Dec 11, 2021

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We have reached the point from where you can count the arrival of the Christmas festival on your fingers. Christmas is one of the friskiest and funkiest festivals in the world. The fun of Christmas can be amplified a multitude of times by sending crispy merry Christmas jokes to near and dear ones. Not only funny Christmas jokes will induce cheer to the whole environment but also give everyone a needed chance to make fun of each other and get nostalgic about childhood memories. To save you from the daunting process of carving hilarious Christmas jokes on your own, we have come up with a handful of the most funny Christmas jokes that are capable enough to rib-tickle the funny bone of the most stubborn guy in your family.

What is a French Santa’s favourite Christmas drink?
Eau, eau, eau!

Why didn’t the pirates go pirating at Christmas?
They were in lockdown because the “Arrrr!” rate had risen.

What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
An abdominal snowman!

How do you make an Octopus laugh?
With ten-tickles, Merry Christmas and happy holidays!

Opened one of my Christmas presents and all that was in it was a single grain of rice?! …
I think it was from my Uncle Ben

What does Santa use to measure?
Santameters!

Why didn’t Rudolph get a good report card???
Because he went down in history.

Who hides in the bakery at Christmas?
A MINCE SPY

What does Christmas and weirdo’s have in comman?
Fruitcake.

What do you get if you cross Santa with a duck?
A Christmas quacker.

What do snowmen like to do on the weekend?
Chill out.

What do you call a blind reindeer?
I have no eye deer.

Santa is the main Clause.
His wife is a relative Clause.
His children are dependent Clauses.
Their Dutch uncle is a restrictive Clause.
Santa’s elves are subordinate Clauses.

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50+ Most Funny Christmas Jokes for Kids and Adults

Funny Christmas jokes that are capable enough to rib-tickle the funny bone of the most stubborn guy in your family.

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Cs get degrees!

1. Me after every class

2. If you really care about your grades

3. When you get a new homework assignment

4. When people ask what you're going to do after college

5. When you see people who don't study and get good grades

6. We're all broke here

7. FREE FOOD IS FREE FOOD!

8. When it seems like everyone in class is smart - EXCEPT THE PEOPLE IN YOUR GROUP PROJECT!!

Other than knowledge and all those important things

How to take stairs.

Caffeine is your friend.

How to study.

Finding free food.

How to take a nap anywhere.

How to appreciate sleep.

How to procrastinate productively.

Surprise: This is not on the syllabus

1. As a freshman, one does get to be called “freshman” by upperclassmen when they walk to parties in a mob of people.

2. Some of the best stories happen after 2 a.m.

3. Upperclassmen live for meal swipes from freshman because they are poor and need free food.

4. People are struggling just as much as you are so you're not alone.

5. You will never take privacy or personal space for granted ever again.

6. You are not the only one who has slept on the community bathroom floor after a night out.

7. Skipping class for Netflix is a valid excuse.

8. It’s totally acceptable to bring a pot of coffee, a sleeping bag and a pillow to the library.

9. Having class with a friend is the best because you can trade off days on who goes to class.

10. When you are a senior, you take the easiest classes to boost your GPA.

11. How to pull an all-nighter.

12. How to handle drunk people.

13. The drunk you does not look out for sober you about 90 percent of the time.

14. How to deal with a hangover.

15. How to interact with people very different from you.

16. The perfect amount to procrastinate on every assignment.

17. How to pass a class without paying for the textbook that was "required."

18. How to calculate your grades to see what you need on every test in order to maintain a passing grade.

19. How to hook-up with someone without getting emotions involved (but we all know that doesn’t happen).

20. How to handle your roommate when you want to strangle them.

21. That you miss your parent’s every day.

22. How to get into a bar when you aren’t 21.

23. How to BS on assignments, out loud and on your resume.

24. That theme parties are the greatest.

25. How to find free events that have free food.

26. That when there are puppies on campus it will be the greatest day of your life.

27. Alarms are necessary and you must set like seven of them in order to wake up in time for class.

28. Greek parties are exactly how they are in movies.

29. Care packages are treated like Christmas presents.

30. The friends you meet in college will become your bridesmaids and groomsmen.

31. That printers only break when you need them the most.

32. Cereal, ramen noodles, Easy Mac and microwavable pancakes can be used for breakfast, lunch and dinner.

33. That classes before 8 a.m. should be illegal.

34. Changing your major is OK.

Don't let the thesaurus-inspired vocabularies in our résumés fool you. We're actually just big kids.

"You should know exactly what career is right for your future by the time you're 18."

"Save all your money."

"Get plenty of sleep and adjust to a regular sleep schedule."

"Make sure to eat healthy, balanced meals. Don't forget those fruits and vegetables."

"Surround yourself with good, moral people."

"Don't do anything stupid."

Seriously, who wouldn't love pizza?

Pizza is like a BFF

It can be delivered right to your door!

You can eat it at any time of the day

It's there for you after a breakup

It's the best party food

Celebrities love it too

Everyone loves it!

Pizza doesn't care what you look like

It comes in all forms

It's the food that is always free at events

It's always available

Two Words: Frozen Pizza

You can customize it any way you want

Going on a date and don't know what to eat? Pizza

Vegan? Vegetarian? Gluten Free?

It's Delicious

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