I spend a ridiculous amount of time in my car.

While some would consider that torturous, it has been during my commutes that I’ve had some of my most spiritually and mentally explorative moments. Driving through areas where I lose radio connection (inevitable when living in rural SC), allows me to do a lot of thinking. One morning, in particular, I was in a great mood, but it quickly shifted when I got stuck going through road construction on my way to school.

I was throwing a pity-party because I was slightly inconvenienced and I was most likely going to be late for class. The rest of the way to school, I guiltily thought about how quickly my joy had been stolen from me during a moment of brief frustration. I began to think about how often these moments occur without me really even noticing them. How many times have I allowed waking up late, bad hair days, traffic, road construction, too many red lights, slow drivers, rude behavior, or countless other things to steal my joy? Why is it that we allow temporary and seemingly minute things to have such a large and lasting impact on our days—and further, our lives? If small things can steal our joy, why can’t they also add to our joy?

Every day when we wake up, we have a choice to make. We individually and consciously have to choose how we’re going to react to our circumstances and we have to continue making that choice throughout our entire day. I wish that I woke up every morning claiming joy and happiness. I wish I was immune to the feelings of despair, insecurity, discouragement, loneliness, helplessness, and heartbreak but I’m not, and no one is. I haven’t experienced anything truly devastating, but I still to some degree (however small it may be) know what brokenness feels like. It’s a terrible feeling, but I don’t believe that it has to be a permanent one.

We are all seeking something greater… simply because that’s how we’re designed—we long for it. We want to be happy, but happiness is a fleeting emotion that is dependent upon our circumstances. Joy isn’t just an emotion that we feel; it’s something we actively choose. Choosing joy is hard, and maintaining it is even harder. It means constantly, actively, and intentionally rejoicing no matter what.

I can't claim to have mastered the art of joy—I haven’t discovered a simple formula for how to find it or keep it, but I have discovered a new way to look at happiness in relation to my circumstances and how to try to live a life of abundant and unconquerable joy.

Philippians 4:4 says, “Rejoice in the Lord always: and again I say, rejoice!” Christ has called His people to live a life of joy—joy that resonates in our hearts and radiates from our faces. By making the choice not to rejoice through my circumstances, I choose to cut off my own access to joy. I lose sight of the larger picture. I doubt God’s sovereignty and His power. By not considering Him in all things, I not only choose to deny myself joy—I grow discouraged and weary. But when I choose joy despite my circumstances—rejoicing in spite of life’s enigmas and discouragements, I am comforted. As I choose to consider Christ in all things, relying on Him and trusting in Him, I choose to “grow” in my faith and ultimately my joy.

In the midst of our darkness, brokenness, and our biggest messes, the light and salt that comes from the decision to consciously choose joy and ultimately choose Christ is so rewarding.

John 1:5 says, “The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it.” God is so much greater than the boundaries that separate you from a true and lasting joy in Christ.

Find happiness that lasts beyond your circumstances—choose to have a joy that endures:

• When your integrity is questioned: People will always criticize you. No matter how pure, your heart and motives will be questioned. Don’t let it make you resentful. Your life is a testimony, and it may be the only example of Christ that someone has or will see. You’re not perfect, but you aren’t called to be.
• Continue to love people even when they prove to be unlovable. Forgive them when they offend you. This doesn’t make you weak; this demonstrates that you have an understanding of the Gospel. Christ paid the ultimate price for our sins, and He forgives us every single day—not because we are deserving of that forgiveness but because He loves us. Forgive your brothers and sister because you have been forgiven. Love, forgive, and choose joy anyway.
• When you feel unloved or heartbroken: No matter how good your intentions, no matter how much or how often you love, and no matter how diligently you try, people are going to hurt you. It’s inevitable. Chances are that you’ll have your heart broken at least once, and chances are even higher that it will be by someone who has said the famous line, “I’ll never hurt you.” Unfortunately, people’s promises are often empty. If their actions prove contradictory to their words, always choose to believe their actions. Love is a verb. Your heart is valuable, and you are deserving of true loyalty and commitment. You are worthy of being loved well. Forgive but walk away from those who make you question that worth.
• We live in a world of consumerism and entitlement where the emphasis is placed on satisfying the self first and worrying about others later (or never). It’s lust that is often confused with love; it’s cheap, and at the end of the day it will leave you empty. That kind of world and that kind of love can make you cold, but don’t let it—choose joy anyway. Pursue God-centered love. Choose to glorify God in your relationships, and He will bless you. You won’t question the faithfulness of “real” love whether it is in your friendships or a romantic relationship. Love, respect, and integrity should be at the core of all of these. Jesus wants so much more for you, I promise, so don’t compromise yourself and settle for a love that is unworthy of your heart—choose joy anyway.
• When you’re discouraged: Life can be really discouraging. Growing up is hard, and finding your place in this world becomes really difficult. People are going to let you down, the dynamics of life are going to continuously change, and it’s going to feel like you’re losing control, but you’re not. God is in control. Let him lead you and comfort you. Your life is so meaningful.
• Psalm 139: 14 says, “I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.” When your heart is heavy and when people and circumstances discourage you, I pray that you cling to the love of Jesus Christ, and I pray that you will choose joy. This world and everything in it is temporary, but the love of God endures forever. Don’t let other’s bad behavior and the fleeting conditions of this life steal the inner peace that comes from a life and vibrant relationship with Jesus Christ. Even through the discouragement, choose joy anyway.

“And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap if we do not give up.”

-Galatians 6:9

“The Lord will fight for you, you need only to be still.”

-Exodus 14:14

“Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.”

-Ephesians 4:32

“Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.”

-Proverbs 4:23

“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away.”

-1 Corinthians 13: 4-8

“Be strong and take heart, all you who hope in the Lord.”

-Psalm 31:24

“But they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.”

-Isaiah 40:31

“Come to me all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.”

-Matthew 11: 28-29

“And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.”

-Romans 8:28

No matter what, choose joy anyway. Learn to focus on the good, and maybe the bad will start to seem a little less daunting. Condition your heart to rely on God and rejoice in his promises for you. Choose to inspire. Choose to grow. Choose to forgive. Choose to love. Choose to serve. Choose happiness, and try to help others make that choice too. You won’t regret it. What a difference we could make in this life in our decision to choose joy anyway.

“Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.”

-1 Thessalonians 16:18

“You make known to me the path of life; you will fill me with joy in your presence, with eternal pleasures at your right hand.”

-Psalm 16:11

“The Lord has done great things for us, and we are filled with joy.”

-Psalm 126:3