Every person experiences life in a different way. With life, comes good times and bad times. For some people, life can seem almost like a roller coaster with ups, downs, and all-arounds.
For me, personally, life has definitely been a roller coaster, especially lately. It really got me thinking, how do people deal with adversity in their lives? I'm sure it's different for everyone, but it still made me curious - kind of explains why I am a psychology major.
Because every person experiences life differently, it is hard to measure what exactly adversity is. By definition, adversity is difficulties; misfortune. It is up to the person experiencing the hardships whether or not they consider it to be an adversity.
Some people have fairly good lives - using the term "good" loosely. Someone who has a functional family and whose parents probably are not divorced, in prison, or drinks and/or does drugs. They, stereo-typically, would have a nice, clean house, and they probably do not have many financial struggles. More than likely, they are successful with the things they do, whether it be in school or at work. On the outside, it seems like things come easy for these, and they do not tend to have serious hardships in their lives.
Others live somewhat more difficult lives - again, using the term loosely. For these people, life never seems to have a dull moment. Perhaps they have gone through foreclosures, house fires, abuse, mental illnesses, physical illnesses, violence, divorce, or financial hardships, or maybe even a combination. There is always some kind of drama happening, and they feel like they can never get a break. They may not always be as happy and bubbly because of dealing with the stresses from everyday life, however, they may also decide to put on a "mask" and pretend that life is going wonderful. No one has to know what they are really struggling with, except for maybe one or two close friends.
No matter which category you fit into, the underlying message is the same; everyone experiences adversity. For some, it can be something as simple as getting a bad grade on a test or in a class. For others though, it can be something more serious like the death of a loved one, or a foreclosed home. Either way, it is still a hardship that needs to be dealt with.
With every adversity that comes into contact with you, there is always a choice on how to deal with it. You can either dwell on it, or you can accept it and figure out how you are going to deal with it. That choice is 100% totally, and completely, up to you.
I, personally, have chosen both of those options at different times in my life, and I can tell you wholeheartedly that when you chose to face it head on rather than dwell on it, life can get so much better, no matter what is thrown in your way.
When I chose to dwell on my problems rather than accepting them, I fell into a deep depression. It got really bad. I got to the point of cutting myself and having suicidal thoughts. Eventually, I even attempted suicide, but as you can see, I am still here, and I am SO grateful for that. I'm grateful because back then, I didn't think I had a choice. I thought because so many horrible things were happening in my life, I was never going to be happy. I was wrong.
I may not be able to control everything that happens in my life; in fact, I can't control most of it, but I know I can control myself and how I am going to respond to different situations. I didn't learn that on my own. I have some pretty amazing people in my life, along with a wonderful, growing relationship with God that has helped me get to where I am today.
Now that I have come to realize that I can choose how I am going to handle adversities, I know I can handle anything, and if there is something that I can't handle, I can give to God. Now, don't get me wrong, there are still days where I struggle, but now, I am not hopeless. I know I can get through whatever it is I am going through, and I know I will always come out stronger on the other side.
No matter what you may be going through, never tell yourself that you do not have a choice. You always have a choice. I know it might feel like you don't, but when you take a step back and look at the situation rationally, you always have a choice. It is just a matter of you choosing to make the right decision. Sometimes it takes a conscious effort to remind yourself of that, but do it. It is so worth it. Life can be so amazing if you choose for it to be.
Life does not always have to be dark and depressing.
Choose the harder way to live -- choose strength.
