For those of you with a keen right eye for detail, you might have noticed that the grass is suspiciously greener, the sky is bluer, and the birds are chirpier. I’m here to take credit for what you might have observed. You see, I recently found the answer to whether or not Choco Chunky Chips Ahoys taste better than Keebler’s Coconut Dreams. Why concern yourself over these two cookies? Because the Oreo is too showy, the Vanilla Wafer is too archaic, and the Fig Newton is too gross. I’m proud to say that my analysis involves no bias or favoritism; both cookies are treated with the same amount of dignity and respect they deserve.
The Quest
Why? Why carry this responsibility? Often, in my youth, I made reckless and wild decisions. I admit, at times, my moral compass sometimes faltered. No longer. 2016 is the year where we should all strive to make responsible decisions. We shouldn’t settle for less than what we deserved. The treat we decide to devour at 2:00 a.m. should be the top shelf cookie, not a bottom-shelf cookie. Ladies and Gentlemen, I'm no hero. I’m just an arguably good looking guy trying to help humanity the best way I know how.
Choco Chunky Chips Ahoy
A true heavy hitter in the cookie community. This rich and tasty cookie is a chocolate lover’s dream. You’ll want to savor each bite as this cookie crumbles and melts in your mouth. In addition, this cookie is a team player, it gets along with everything and everyone. A refreshing glass of milk accentuates and heightens the chocolate bliss this cookie is sure to give you. Give it a try, and try not to die…from happiness!
Coconut Dreams
So, elephant in the room-Coconut Dreams are a blatant copy of Samoas, the famous and beloved Girl Scout Cookie. It’s an imposter of a well-known American favorite. Coconut Dreams, let me tell you one thing. I’ve eaten Samoas, I knew Samoas, Samoas was a friend of mine. Coconut Dreams, you’re no Samoas.
Coconut Dreams, I don’t care that you’re delicious. I don’t care that you and Samoas are from the same parent company, Kellogg. I don’t care, because you tricked me into eating you by riding the coattails of another well-known cookie. Your existence highlights the ugly villainy of capitalism. Your existence threatens the livelihood of friendly girl scouts. Coconut Dreams, you’re the supervillain of cookies.
Conclusion
Based off my findings, Choco Chunky Chips Ahoy reign supreme. They are the one true cookie. Perfect for any occasion-movie nights, dates, weddings, baptisms, funerals, you name it. Don't let me catch you eating a Coconut Dream; let's start 2016 at a good place!
