What I Learned From My Chinese Heritage | The Odyssey Online
Start writing a post
Politics and Activism

What I Learned From My Chinese Heritage

And why I'm proud of it.

126
What I Learned From My Chinese Heritage
Moonglass Studios

We are burning zhiqian again.

My dad drags a lighter gently across the joss paper stack's edges, and flames leap to interrupt the blue-bruised twilight. The zhiqian curl, fire hungrily charring their edges, outlining dad’s face in a tapestry of blood red and ebony. My mom and I hold each other's hands as we both think of gonggong, my grandpa. We remember different things, but our pain is the same: sharp and bitter, infused with a tinge of sweetness like an amplified aftertaste of tieguanyin tea. It has been seven years, and every year, we light the zhiqian, and every year, I worry that the memories will fade. Still, as the zhiqian rustle, I know gonggong’s essence will not.

We used to worry about running out of zhiqian, but being a Chinese-American in Southern California means that a one-hour drive teleports us to Chinatown. There, zhiqian is sold in fat bundles at variety stores along with fake jian that hang so low from the ceiling, their blades skim the part in my hair. None of the jian is worth buying, though. Years of Kung Fu have taught me that the only cheap sword worth unsheathing is one I make myself. Nonetheless, even the masters, our shifu, aren't immune to the cultural love for haggling--anything is too expensive, after all, until it is free.

Shifu also tell us that meditation is the antidote to time, and as I grow as a budding Buddhist, I believe it. When I miss my gonggong, I meditate. When my heart spins, restless with a stupefying thirst to watch the ice castles in Harbin glow as I dance in layers of storm-shadowed snow jackets, my breath smearing the air in arabesque beneath stars as bright as the zhiqian fire, I meditate. Time moves ceaselessly forward, but my culture has taught me that we progress only when we stop to reflect.

A famous Chinese proverb says that a bird doesn't sing because it has an answer—it sings because it has a song. Just as meditation teaches me humility through reflections, Chinese music has taught me vulnerability through its earnestness. My erhu can unleash the wail of a river, though it is not my bow but the soul stitched into rhythms thousands of years old that makes it sing. Amidst the music, I forget to pretend to feel nothing. In the songs of my ethnic minority group, buyi, my emotions betray me again, and I’m left as breathless by the poetry of culture as I am by its ability to so utterly understand me. Not just with music, but with land. For though buyi represent only 0.02 percent of the Chinese population, our home province, Guizhou, boasts jade mountains, bamboo-studded hills, and rivers gleaming in rain-chilled sunlight like silk. The land has so little meaning on a map but so much meaning in my head. It reminds me that the tiny is mighty, the heart is huge and the human is wonderfully small.

The night we burned the zhiqian, I told gonggong my dreams. I told him about this culture that has taught me that I am not singular but plural; that I am the sunset on one side of the world and the sunrise on the other; that I am the legacy of the Tang Dynasty and the carver of the modern odyssey; that I am a child of the dragons and an awe-brimmed cosmopolitan. I told him, with eyes closed but heart opened, that my dream was to make this a world deserving of the beauty my culture has helped me see: quiet love, reflectivity and soul-deep vulnerability.


Glossary (in order of appearance, with links to the Wikipedia entry when useful):

Zhiqian: Joss paper, essentially fake money burnt as offerings/blessings to the dead

Gonggong: Maternal grandpa

Tieguanyin: A type of Chinese oolong tea

Jian: Chinese sword

Shifu: Masters, usually used in martial arts to refer to the teachers (think Kung Fu Panda--Master Oogway)

Harbin: Capital city of the Heilongjiang province in northeastern China, famous for its ice sculptures

Erhu: Chinese fiddle, a two-stringed instrument usually used to play traditional Chinese music

Buyi: One of China's 56 ethnicities, considered an ethnic minority

Guizhou: A province in southwestern China


Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Lifestyle

8 Stereotypes Sorority Girls Are Tired Of Hearing

We don't buy into these... just like how we don't buy our friends.

240
Sorority Girls
Verge Campus

Being a part of any organization undoubtedly comes with the pitfalls of being grouped into negative stereotypes, and sororities are certainly no exception. Here are the top few things, that I find at least, are some of the most irritating misconceptions that find their way into numerous conversations...

8. "The whole philanthropy thing isn't real, right?"

Well all those fundraisers and marketing should would be a waste then wouldn't they?

Keep Reading...Show less
Lifestyle

11 Things Summer Nannies Can Relate To

There are plenty of obstacles that come when taking care of kids, but it's a very rewarding experience.

1332
kids in pool

As a college student, being a nanny over the summer is both enjoyable and challenging. Underneath the seemingly perfect trips to the pool or countless hours spent playing Monopoly are the obstacles that only nannies will understand. Trading in your valuable summer vacation in return for three months spent with a few children less than half your age may seem unappealing, but so many moments make it rewarding. For my fellow summer nannies out there, I know you can relate.

Keep Reading...Show less
girl thinking
thoughtcatalog.com

There are a lot of really easy, common names in the U.S. and while many of those simple names have different spellings, most of the time, pronunciation is not an issue that those people need to worry about. However, others are not as fortunate and often times give up on corrections after a while. We usually give an A+ for effort. So, as you could probably imagine, there are a few struggles with having a name that isn’t technically English. Here are just a few…

Keep Reading...Show less
Daydreaming

day·dream (ˈdāˌdrēm/): a series of pleasant thoughts that distract one's attention from the present.

Daydreams, the savior of our life in class. Every type of student in the classroom does it at least once, but most cases it is an everyday event, especially in that boring class -- you know the one. But what are we thinking while we are daydreaming?

Keep Reading...Show less
Jessica Pinero
Jessica Pinero

Puerto Ricans. They are very proud people and whether they were born on the island or born in the United States by Puerto Rican parent(s). It gets even better when they meet another fellow Puerto Rican or Latino in general. You’ll know quickly if they are Puerto Rican whether the flag is printed somewhere on their person or whether they tell you or whether the famous phrase “wepa!” is said.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments