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Cheesy Pick Up Lines Through The Ages

And why they work so well.

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Cheesy Pick Up Lines Through The Ages
Sveta Riley

Cheesy pickup lines? Most people believe they are "turn offs". Honestly if someone used a cheesy pickup line on me, I would be more likely to go on a date with them than if they had asked me out in the "normal" way. Almost all of the girls whom I have talked to regarding the usage of pickup lines agree that they would be more likely go on a date with someone who used a cheesy pickup line to ask them out.

Why does this work? For thousands of years, people have asked this question. Looking at pickup lines throughout the centuries, I have concluded they work because pickup lines make everyone, no matter how glorious they seem, look like dorks. Shockingly, people want to date real people! People with flaws and cute little quirks "woo" other people.

Story time:

My parents have been married for 25 years. Do you want to know how my dad proposed to my mom? With a sock. Yep, it sounds really dorky, but it ended up working extremely well.

Growing up, it seemed as if one of my dad's favorite things were socks. He would wear socks until my mom made him go buy new ones because the ones he owned had holes where the toes were supposed to be shielded with cotton. Apparently, this was his love for many years before my parents even met.

He would ask my mom, while they were still dating, to darn (sew) his socks and she would always respond with a forceful "no" because my mom hates sewing. It turned into this joke among them and when the time for marriage came around, my dad had the glorious idea to put the ring box in the toe of the sock, ball the sock up and beg my mom to "just look at it to see if she could maybe fix the 'holes' in the sock." Lo and behold, when my mom unwrapped the sock, she found the ring box and evidently said yes.

This probably sounds extremely dorky, but it worked because it was humorous, thoughtful and left my dad vulnerable. Girls appreciate guys who can be cheesy or silly without worrying about what others around them may think.

Men, I encourage you to make yourself vulnerable and use some cheesy pickup lines or go on a date with a girl who uses cheesy pick-up lines.

Women, I encourage you to seriously consider going on a date with a guy who used a cheesy pickup line on you or use them yourself.

I have provided some pickup lines that have worked throughout the centuries for you to use at your leisure.

Ancient Middle East 971-931 BCE:

"Your hair is like a flock of goats descending from Mount Gilead" (Song of Solomon 4:1, The Bible).

Ancient Greece:

"Are you Apollo? Cause you light up my day and are music to my ears." (Tumblr)

"Your beauty could launch a thousand ships." (Pick-up Lines)

Ancient Egypt:

"You can call me Isis, cause no matter what happens to you I’ll be here to pick up the pieces." (Tumblr)

Dark Ages:

"Your eyes are as dark as a castle moat by midnight." (Pick-up Lines)

"Thou hast hit on me harder than the black plague!" (Pick-up Lines)

Shakespearean:

"Hear my soul speak:

The very instant that I saw you, did

My heart fly to your service; there resides,

To make me slave to it;"

-Ferdinand (The Tempest) (Pick-up Lines)

Colonial:

"Sweet lady, your virtues have so strangely taken up my thoughts, that therein they encrease and multiply in abundant felicity." (Pick-up Lines)

1900's:

"Did you invent the airplane? 'Cause you seem Wright to me." (Pick-up Lines)

Modern:

"Hey girl, do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?"(Pick-up Lines)

"If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put 'U' and 'I' together."(Pick-up Lines)

"If you were a tropical fruit, you'd be a Fine-apple!" (Pick-up Lines)

"You better call Life Alert, 'cause I've fallen for you and I can't get up." (Pick-up Lines)

Now, go out into the world and put your new found love of pickup lines to good use!

Disclaimer: I said "cheesy", not "creepy"; there is a difference.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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