Living as an undercover sympath in today's emotional trigger-driven society is often frustrating, to say the least. If one could often be described as "cold", "emotionless", "unsympathetic", "stubborn", or (in a more serious instance) "hard-hearted" and "cruel", this person likely suffers from the disease of extreme emotional reserve. As a victim of this affliction myself, I have always found it difficult not only to provide emotional support to my friends and loved ones - at times considering these displays to be nothing but mindless histrionics - but am also seriously lacking in the ability to support my own emotions. (Surprise! They really do exist!) Life becomes more complex than necessary when one sees everything, hears everything, feels everything, internalizes it... and shows no sign of any of these processes. Additionally, as an argumentative individual, confrontations (especially within the family circle) breed a specific species of pent-up anger. Cold rationalization and uncompromising logic are often seen by those more in touch with their sentimentality to indicate a lack of sympathy, an inability to connect on a "human level".
Why does it become so difficult to communicate the fact that we have absorbed every word just spoken by that human who is convinced we weren't listening to them? Why is it equally difficult to communicate to others that our disagreement does not mean disapproval? Whether or not I think you have a great personality, I will still pick your argument apart for fallacies, and proceed to logically deconstruct it. But I do love you. Why is it that our good intentions to assist those who don't have a bloody clue what they are doing comes across as spiteful bossiness? (Forgive me for the coarse language, but this apology won't come too often.) When we mourn, why do we always seem to be shunned, rather than comforted?
The level of internalization and isolation that undercover sympaths (i.e. introverted "analysts", INTX) often find necessary in order to function is puzzling, at best, to most other individuals, even extroverted "analyst" (ENTX) and introverted "feeler" (INFX) personality types. Reticence and rationalization are not attractive traits when combined in such a manner, and often make undercover sympaths seem disinterested, self-absorbed, and judgmental. While I'm not dismissing that this may (at times) be the case, most introverted analyst types come across as such do to a reluctance to expose the inner workings of their heart and mind to what they may perceive to be a hostile environment, critical and full of a lack of understanding (or mere ignorance). There must be a connection of trust established before any emotions can begin to be revealed, before the rich emotional psychology of an undercover sympath begins to become evident. This process can be frustrating for all parties involved, marked by evasive remarks, emotionally detached rhetoric, hidden tears and a strange, pervasive mistrust on any given level of a relationship.
As with any relationship (but even more crucial) time really is of the essence when waiting for an undercover sympath to open up. Identifying these individuals prior to an intimate acquaintanceship or friendship is extremely important to smooth dealings with them. (Mind you, there are no uniform traits or "symptoms"! Though there are some common threads in behavioral displays, they can vary greatly and entail many different thought processes!) Once this is accomplished, great mindfulness about the communication styles and patterns of introverted analysts must be executed, not by a change in behavior (undercover sympaths are really good at taking the behavior of other personality types in their native context), but by the realization that, no, we are not constantly trying to shoot you down! Yes, if we insult you, we probably like you a lot!
We live in a world of diversity. This diversity is not only religious, political, ideological/moral, racial, ethnic, national and linguistic, but also psychological. My message to you, dear reader, whether you are an undercover sympath (INTX), or otherwise (ESFX/ISFX, ENTX, ISTX/ESTX, INFX/ENFX), is to learn to understand the way that those with different thought processes, influence from upbringing, and/or psychological issues see the world, interact with it, and how this understanding can affect you as a member of the interconnected human community.
