Making true friends is a rare occurrence. While there are acquaintances such as classmates and teammates on social media, aside from school or cross country practice, they are pretty much completely irrelevant to life. As a military kid, I had the blessing of being able to attend the same high school all four years, and it gave me a good insight into who I should trust versus someone who either ignored me or peer pressured me. College added to that, but I have unfortunately also endured a fair share of people who I thought I could be good friends with but who have put me down, ignored me, or just did not want to respect me overall. From experience, I have noticed red flags to look out for, but I am posting the top 22 that really made me notice!
1. Accusations
Playing the blame game and name calling is something that should be left in childhood.
2. Assumptions
Assumption and jumping to conclusions without being able to support your statement just makes you look more ignorant.
3. Belittling
No matter what classes you take or how much you work, comparing that to somebody who is trying makes you look no better.
4. Constantly overreacting
Yelling, cussing, and guilt tripping over a simple mistake or a petty bad decision are ineffective and hurtful.
5. Excluding
Not being invited to social gatherings or not being a part of a discussion around you is a big red flag!
6. Failing to listen to/consider your thoughts
True friends do not ignore each others' feelings, no matter how easily offended they might seem to get!
7. Gossiping
Whispering or showing texts in front of you is super petty and immature and it just makes you look like you don't have the guts to say it to our face which is pretty bad.
8. Hypocrisy
If I do something and you call me out on it by calling me names yet you do it just as much, if not more, then you are a full on hypocrite!
9. Irrelevant small talk
Telling somebody that you could say something but you're not going to is unnecessary and irritating. If you don't want to talk about it then why bring it up?
10. Judging you, your decisions, and your other friends
Being judgmental and making unjustified recommendations to people is hurtful and wrong.
11. Making excuses
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If you do something socially wrong and try to justify it, you're making an invalid excuse, and it just gives you another reason to be left.
12. Narcissism
Acting like you know everything and making other people feel like they have no say is narcissism.
13. Narrow-mindedness/negativity
Holding grudges and name calling just because you don't agree is socially unacceptable and ignorant.
14. Nosiness
Taking candid pictures of people in public or asking people about their lives just to make them feel incompetent is nosy and childish.
15. Passive aggressiveness
Taking screenshots, candid videos and pictures, or using higher terminology as a put down and then making people look it up is straight up passive aggressiveness, when you can just say directly what you feel.
17. Playing favorites
Doing stuff such as telling friends jokes or stories and saying that you told them yet you're not repeating it is super lame and shady, as is comparing one friend to another in terms of personality.
18. Refusing to own up to offending you
Failing to admit that you have an attitude all the while criticize, roll your eyes, and smirk is pretty ironic don't you think?
19. Spreading rumors
Just because somebody said that does not mean that it is true and it definitely does not make it a story to be set in stone!
20. Taking advantage of you
Using somebody for your own benefit when you are just as, if not more capable of doing it on your own is a sign of laziness and degrading.
21. Trying to change who you are
If you enjoy doing something then that's fine, but it's not fine to demand that somebody else do it when they clearly have no interest!
22. Using you for entertainment at your expense
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Making a joke is one thing, but if the receiver does not find it funny, then that's an indication that it is lousy and should be stopped.