I'm known to those around me as someone who participates quite regularly in what I call road rants. Not to be confused with road rage, which I try my hardest never to be the cause of or to get caught in the middle of. In fact, after four years of driving, I honked for the first time this past week only because this lady decided to turn across my lane as I'm approaching going 60 mph with no time to stop. In this instance, it was a life or death situation which trumped my fear of losing my life due to a road rage incident caused because I honked at them. I avoid physical acts of anger and annoyance while driving.
Instead, I turn my many, many emotions into a giant never-ending berate of ranting. Much to my poor passengers' and boyfriend's dismay.
Here are 11 reasons that trigger my road rants on an almost daily basis:
1. The impatient honker at stop lights
I'm just saying, if you can't wait five seconds for that driver to make sure some car isn't going to come ramming through the intersection you need some help. Give the person a chance before you start screaming at them with your obnoxiously over-used horn.
2. The driver who is always in a hurry
If I'm going 50 mph when the speed limit is 50 mph then I just have to say: stop following me as close as you can because you want me to go faster. When I don't know a route or a road very well I don't like exceeding the speed limit in any way. I want to feel comfortable on that road instead. Pull back, wait for an opportunity to pass me and I will gladly let you get ahead of me.
3. The tailgater
GiphySpeaking of following my car too closely, cut it out. You do nothing but risk us BOTH getting into an accident. How did you pass drivers ed if no one taught you about the proper following distance? Ask yourself: am I a good driver? And I can tell you the answer. If you know what the proper following distance rule is then you can answer the previous question with a yes. If not, then you better start hitting the books before you hit another vehicle.
4. The parking lot racer
GiphyDude, it's a parking lot. Slow down and watch out. I can not tell you how many times I've almost been hit head-on walking to my apartment building from the parking lot because some idiot won't slow down as he rounds the corner 15 mph over the speed limit only to discover a pedestrian walking. I get that five miles per hour is slow and I'll be the first to admit I've gone faster than that but go fast enough that you have time to react to what you can't see ahead of you. Please and thank you from a girl who desperately isn't ready to die because of a stupid driver.
5. Drunk driving: the profession of the kings and queens of stupid drivers
GiphyIf you wanted to be the worst of the worst then you have finally succeeded. Come on guys, we have uber and Lyft and taxis and friends and you know, TONS OF OPTIONS NOT TO GET BEHIND THE WHEEL DRUNK. Don't let your own stupidity, selfishness, and pride risk other peoples lives. Do yourself and everyone else a favor and leave your car keys at home.
6. The lane changer
GiphyYou, my friend, can be one of the more masked nuisances on the road. Your ability to risk yours and others safety for the mere gain of a few minutes saved is one of the more selfish and reckless acts. I'm not talking about those of us who change lanes from time to time when the person ahead of us is turning, going 20 miles under the speed limit when there's no one ahead of them, or when we ourselves are preparing to be in the lane required for us to turn. I'm talking about those nuisances who can be seen swerving between cars, unable to be held back by traffic or speeding laws, because all of the lives of the other drivers and passengers on the roads is worth risking for the five extra minutes they're gaining outside of their car. You may think I'm exaggerating but research shows you are more prone to get into an accident if you change lanes then if you stay in one. It can even end up causing you to take longer to reach your destination.
7. The racer wannabe
You know that idiot of a driver you see speeding to their every destination. Doesn't matter the speed limit we all know they're going over it. Needless to say: it's another safety issue.
8. The phone addict
GiphyLet's keep this one simple. Put it down when you're behind the wheel. Utilize all this fancy new technology we have now to keep your eyes focused on the road. My driver's ed instructor always said our car was like a weapon and it could be quite deadly. Ask a passenger to message for you if you want but do everyone a favor and learn to go without your phone for a moment.
9. The slow and steady does not win this race
Boy, if you can't go at least the speed limit why are you on this road? I get sometimes there's weather and other hazards that cause us as drivers to make the decision to go slower than the speed limit but I'm talking about those who go 10 mph under for no reason.
10. The road rage kings and queens
GiphyYou are one of the worst there is. You use your vehicle as a weapon of anger and should not have your license. Calm down dude and breathe for a minute. Road rage is not going to work out for anybody. Choose to road rant instead.
11. Blind to the white lines at stoplights
There's a reason for that line. It's usually to ensure there's enough room for those turning to safely make it into their lane through the intersection. Stop ignoring them and make the safe decision.
We all have our own set of driving pet peeves and these are mine. Daily we grab our keys and hop into our vehicles to take to the road, never thinking that day will be our last. Don't be the stupid driver who does something that causes an accident. It's not worth whatever you're trying to achieve. To all my fellow drivers who practice road ranting, I feel your pain and frustration. Maybe one day our pet peeves will become a less common occurrence.
