I am studying in a primarily Catholic country for my junior year of college, I have had some time to reflect on my own relationship with Catholicism and what my religion means to me.

I have practiced Catholicism my entire life. I was baptized not long after my birth, I regularly attended CCD classes from 1st grade through 6th grade, receiving the sacraments of Reconciliation and my First Communion in 2nd grade and I was Confirmed in 6th grade, thus concluding my time as a CCD student. The year following my First Communion, I decided that I wanted to be an Altar Server and volunteered my Sundays from 3rd grade through my senior year of high school to serve at mass.

During my junior and senior years of high school, I returned to CCD as a teaching assistant, helping 3rd and 4th graders learn more about saints and understand the seasons of the liturgical year. Every week I looked forward to working with the students because they were so enthusiastic about learning; not to be too cliché, but their energy really revived my spirit and if I'm being completely honest it's one of the activities that I miss the most from my time in high school.

When I entered my first year of college, I was happy to find a Christian Fellowship on campus. Most of the people were initially very inviting and I had never felt so comfortable talking about my faith and although it was new to me, I found that I really enjoyed their large group worship sessions. The majority of the students in the Fellowship were not Catholic but all of them still accepted me for my own beliefs and were completely open to hearing my own interpretation of different teachings. All, that is, except for one student.

I truly do not believe that this student meant to insult me for my beliefs, so I'm not going to reveal exactly what was said, but the general gist of it was something along the lines of, "Catholics are not real Christians" and this unfortunately dulled my spirit for a few weeks.

Fortunately, when I did muster up the courage to open up to some of the student leaders, they reassured me that I was still absolutely welcome. Unfortunately, during my sophomore year, scheduling conflicts prevented me from being able to attend their large group meetings so I found a local Catholic church and began attending mass on Sundays when it was possible (admittedly, this was much easier for me to do when the weather was pleasant because it was a mile walk from campus.)

Obviously Catholics are still Christians even though some of our practices are different and yes, a lot of the common "beliefs" that people associate with Catholicism are rooted in hatred as opposed to love as Jesus taught. But, I believe that with the ever tolerant and loving Pope Francis as the current Bishop of Rome and leader of the Catholic Church, we are progressing in the right direction.

In terms of my own Catholicism, I believe that Jesus Christ suffered and died for us and I believe in the transubstantiation of the bread and wine into the body and blood of Christ during communion. However, I do not believe that Jesus would ever discriminate against those based solely on their sexuality and I myself am entirely for equal rights and treatment of the LGBTQIA+ community. I do not think of God as a "man" even though the pronoun "He" is used in the Bible.

I believe that God is a universal force that we cannot even begin to understand. In fact, I believe that God created evolution and that modern science and medicine are actually proof that God exists and they make God look even more awesome.

I believe that women (and gender-non conforming/non-binary individuals) are absolutely equal to men and they should have the opportunity to become priests if that is what they desire.

I believe that in any religion we are all talking to the same God, whether God be known as Adonai, Allah, or any other name. (I even believe that God can be described purely as energy!)

I am not a perfect Catholic, in fact I am far from it, but I do love how my religion makes me feel. I still believe that I am in control of my own destiny but when all else fails, I know that I can still pray to God and ask for guidance or protection (hence the reason I bless myself with the sign of the cross before I drive anywhere.) My religion gives me a sense of comfort in that even when I feel most alone, trapped in my own mind suffering from a bout of anxiety or depression, I do not feel truly alone. I feel God's presence in the love that I feel for my family, my boyfriend, my friends, and even in nature. In short, my Catholic religion gives me a sense of strength and relief when I need it most.