Young women grow up being told we need to "be careful" on the streets. We're told stories about kidnappings, murders, and other horrors until we barely even want to step foot outside anymore. Be alert. Always carry mace or your keys between your fingers. You can wear earbuds…. but if it's dark don't actually play music so you can be as alert as possible. If you can avoid it, don't go outside after dark at all.
When I told my mom I wanted to go to Temple, she was terrified for me and after a year and a half, she still gets freaked out if I tell her I'm walking alone at night. After growing up hearing those things, can you blame us for being scared?
When we're cat called, sure, some women take it as a compliment. But I've found that most of us just try to avoid eye contact with our "admirers" and pray that they don't start following us for not giving them the attention that they want. And yes, horrible things happen to men on the streets as well. I will never deny that. But it happens much more often to women because we carry the stereotype that we're weaker and more gullible. Easier to lure.
And don't you DARE say it's our fault because I've been catcalled in a winter coat and jeans...not to mention what comes out of your mouth is not controlled by me.
A few weeks ago, my boyfriend was running across his college campus. He passed a group of girls, who appreciated his attractiveness and yelled "get it" at him. Later that week he told me about this encounter, and how he was flattered to get compliments from random girls on the street.
After he told me this I said, "That's nice...but you know, that's the difference between men and women." For him, it's a compliment. For us, it's harassment and it's terrifying. We never know when a "hey sexy" will turn into an unwanted arm around our shoulders or when a "Where are you going, baby?" will become stalking.
In conclusion, to all the straight male-identifying people out there, when you see a beautiful girl on the street please think twice before expressing your opinions outwardly. Odds are, all we're going to do is walk a little faster and pray that we safely get to where we're going.
(Note: I realize this article is not sensitive to the LGBTQ+ community, and anyone who is not cisgender. I wrote it from my experience as a straight cisgender female, and hope I got the point across with little offense to the people in those important communities.)
