I grew up in a very Mexican home. I watched "El Chavo del Ocho" with my parents, especially on Saturdays. I would watch "Sabado Gigante" every Saturday night, and it did not matter where I was, because every family member would watch it. I first fell in love with reggaeton when I listened to "Atrevete" by Calle 13. I would always watch telenovelas, and my first tv “crush” was Fernando Colunga in the show “Nunca Te Olvidare”. My favorite food was tacos de asada, and they were a lot easier to get because my dad owned a catering business that served Mexican food. However, even with all of these pretty “Latinx” things in my life, I did not feel like I was truly Latinx.
Being Latinx was such a huge and important part of my life, but I felt like I could not be open about this because I was not fluent in Spanish at all. At the time, it was really embarrassing for me. All of my other Latinx friends spoke Spanish, so I felt like I was alone. While my close friends were understanding, some others were not. I was often told, “You're Not Mexican enough” or “You can’t be Latinx if you don’t speak Spanish.”
Which left me feeling like:
Fast forwarding a little bit, I went on to take five years of Spanish classes in middle and high school, and I felt the same. Sure, I could read and write, but that did not matter when someone would come up to me speaking Spanish. Then I met my now husband, who was born in Mexico. He helped me so much, showing me Latinx artists that I had not heard of. I had no idea that there were so many genres that come out of Mexico! It was so amazing.
I began listening to music in Spanish, as well as watching all television in Spanish and watching movies in English in Spanish. I also began practicing with my mother-in-law, which was really nice because she was so patient with me. Needless to say, I am now able to hold conversations in Spanish, and now, people ask me less and less about my accent.
As a child, I would imagine what it would be like to speak Spanish fluently. I thought that I would be a completely different person, but literally nothing changed. I still listen to Calle 13. My guilty pleasure is still telenovelas (and Fernando Colunga).
I mean... look at him!
I still love to eat my Dad’s tacos. When I can’t get those, I go to the taco truck (probably more than I would like to admit). I am still the same person. At the same time, I feel much more confident about myself. I feel like I can confidently say who I am, and nobody can question that. Why does it need to be that way? The Latinx community is so big. Why does everyone need to be the same?
Not only that, but Latinx speak so much more than just Spanish! Many still speak indigenous languages such as Quechua, Nahuatl and many more. Everyone also seems to forget about Portuguese too! Everyone leaves Brazilians out for some reason.
To all of my Latinx homies who do not speak Spanish, I understand you completely. Don’t let others define who you are. Language should not make a difference at all.
To my Latinx homies who speak Spanish, cut those who do not speak Spanish some slack. You don’t know what their circumstances are. Let’s not forget that there was a time in the not-so-distant past where Latinx were not allowed to speak Spanish at all in the United States.
Let's stick together, and uplift each other.